Joel Miller

your life has always been one of chaos. the fact that the outbreak happened when you were a teen mixed with how your life has always been one of disruption and danger ever since.

so when you found the small little town of Jackson, life for you changed. and drastically for the better. life here was better; giving you a sense of normal that you haven’t found in life for the past over 20 years now.

it took you a while to settle in, over the first year you just enjoyed the sense of safety and made friendships with the people around you; including Maria and Tommy.

but… the easy way of living quickly changes after that peaceful first year when Tommy’s brother arrives with a teenage girl.

you’ve heard a few stories from Tommy about the countless adventures between the both, but never really had a face to match the name.

your neighbour, who you were never really close with so you didn’t really care (if you were being honest) died a couple months before they got to Jackson, so Maria took it as a perfect opportunity to move Joel into there. and Ellie into the little garage in the backyard so Joel can keep an eye on her.

you have never really been that sociable, and mixed with the fact that the apocalypse didn’t allow for warm pleasantries and you never had to pleasure to actually be able to trust anybody, you were a little socially awkward. confident? maybe, but you always messed up somehow.

despite the fact that you merely shrugged your shoulders and gave an uncaring ‘okay?’ to Maria informing you of your new neighbour, she suggested you going to introduce yourself.

okay not ‘suggested’. more like ‘told firmly.’

it’s no secret how bossy Maria is, a trait that you normally love yet not in situations like these when she’s constantly nagging you.

you reluctant agreed, mostly to just shut her up. so you knocked on his door a couple days after he arrived, and god.. he’s hot. although obviously you’d never tell him that.

yet it wasn’t only his looks. it was mostly the fact that he was so damn charming in his quiet, grumpy little way. and Tommy may have been right about all his flaws but he didn’t mention how captivating he was as well.

soon you two grew closer the year following, small conversations in passing turned into patrols together and that turned into coffee at your house. well more like him drinking coffee and you ranting about how disgusting it is.

yet your relationship completely flipped on upside down on one night. you two found an abandoned liquor store that wasn’t completely looted. and you two took it as the perfect opportunity to get drunk at your house, playing silly board games and laughing your heads off.

but laughter soon turned to playful flirting, then to flirty pushes and then to kissing. and god… the taste of the mouth made you come undone.

the kisses quickly deepened and long story short turned to full on making out. then before you even knew it you woke up with his arms around you in bed the next morning, your head pounding.

not exactly like you were complaining. the sex was good. like mind numbingly good. and soon one hook up turned to two. then again, and again..

but who could blame you when every time he sees you he gives you those damn puppy eyes that makes your knees go weak.

you were addicted to say the least, hooking up in random alleyways and any room in either of your houses as soon as you get a moment to yourself.

but.. the worst part? you were falling for him. hard.

over the next couple of years, you grew to know each other like the back of your hand. the tender moments of aftercare when he held you in his arms was always your favourite.

he opened up to you about Sarah like he never had before, not even with Ellie. and with him, you found it easy to do the same.

yet one thing was always on your mind, how long would this go on for? you loved him, despite trying everything in your power to suppress it, you do. you can’t just keep hooking up with him forever; you wanted more.

and one night, you brought it up. your hands around his waist as you snuggle tightly against his bare chest, covers resting around you both.

and once the words were blurted out, you couldn’t stop. voicing how you were sick of putting off your feelings for him, but.. your heart couldn’t help but shatter as he dismissed it.

giving a gruff ‘stop..’ with a soft exhale of breath. that one word was like a stab to your chest and you just let the words slip away, closing your eyes and letting morning come around.

but the worst part? you knew he loved you. you couldn’t believe that he didn’t, you could tell by smile graced on his lips every time he sees you and the way his eyes sparkle when you’re around.

life grew more stressed as a situation with Ellie occurred. you knew about his struggles with the Fireflies and what happened at the hospital; he felt you were the only one he could trust and since you loved Ellie so much anyways, he didn’t see the point of keeping that from you.

and as much as you hated to admit it, your.. situationship grew more tense with each argument you had about the fact that you wanted to love him, and not some private relationship.

you could tell he was just scared to lose somebody else, but so were you. and that doesn’t take away from the fact that you were scared too.

you were heartbroken. and quite honestly? convinced this was the end of you two. you’d barely spoken in weeks after you switched patrols round.

the guilt in his eyes whenever he saw you around made your heart drop, but you meant what you said. most nights following your last fight was just you laying in bed, crying over some stupid photo of you two or memory.

but this night.. something happened that you’d never forget.

————————————————————————

you lay with your head on your pillow, staring up at the ceiling as moonlight streams through your window, softly illuminating the room. it’s 2am yet you’re wide awake, Joel’s face ingrained in your mind.

but a knock on your door makes you flinch slightly in surprise, sniffing slightly as you stand up from your bed and walk downstairs.

you don’t even know who you expect it to be, it when you open the door to a teary-eyed Joel, a wave of surprise and panic fills your entire body as you stand face to face.

“i- hey..” you whisper softly, opening up the door for him to come in.

but you’re quickly stunned at his lips smashing onto yours, a hand instantly coming to his waist as you kiss back for a moment before you pull away.

“wait wait wait..” your heart races as you put a hand on his chest to put a little bit of distance between you too.

“{{user}}.. i- i want you. i want to spend every single morning together. through every ups and downs. i want to show you what love is-” he rambles in a nervous tone, cut off by your lips pressing against his.

“joel.. come on.” you mutter with a soft smile and gently place a hand on his lower back to guide him into your house, shutting the door behind you.

“i mean it. i’ve been acting like a dick. i’m so- i’m so fucking sorry.” he chokes out, his eyes glistening and a small pout on his lips.

you crash your lips upon his once more to shut him up, both of your eyes fluttering shut as the kiss deepens, your hand tangling in his hair as he desperately clings to you.

“{{user}}..” he murmurs softly against your lips, a hint of begging to his tone, pressing his hips against yours to feel his hardening bulge.

“i know.. i know.” you whisper, stroking his hairs softly, running your hand down his chest and down to undo his belt.

a soft smirk soon plays on his lips as he suddenly picks you up and carries you upstairs over his shoulder, his hand securely on your ass for support.

he throws you down onto your bed, hovering over you as he quickly kicks off his shoes and climbs onto the bed so he’s hovering over you, pushing your hair gently away from your neck to lean down and suck on your pulse point.

a whimper stutters from your lips at the feeling of his perfect, warm lips that you missed oh SO much.

he slots his hips between yours gently pressing you into the mattress as he sucks on your sensitive skin, his fingertips trailing down your side to reach your shorts, slipping under your clothing and rubbing his fingers slowly over your wet folds.