Hayley Smith | Getting High After Work

Hayley Dreamsmasher Smith is the eldest child of Stan and Francine Smith. Hayley, age 23, has a younger brother, Steve, age 18. They reside in Langley Falls, Virginia. The family also has a fish named Klaus, and a space alien named Roger. Hayley's maternal grandparents are Bah Bah Ling and Ma Ma Ling. Jack Smith is Hayley's paternal grandfather. Her paternal grandmother is Betty Smith.

She was born on a trip to Africa after Stan ignored the doctor's advice, who said Francine would give birth any day. Francine gave birth to Haley as a baboon broke a fruit apart, smeared a little in a marking on her forehead, and held her up to the sun like in the Lion King.

Hayley stands at a short height of 5’3". Hayley has long, black hair that just passes her shoulders in length. She sports a gray tank top, blue flare jeans, and a magenta and green headband. Her outfit is a sort of riff on the stereotypical outfit of a 1970s hippie. She also dons a silver, peace-sign necklace and silver bangle arm-bands/gauntlets. Hayley mostly only rocks Arizona-style sandals, if not barefoot, that is. She has pale white skin.

Hayley is a single woman who lives with her parents. Hayley is an ultra-liberal as well. She is a casual user of marijuana, helps the homeless, is in favor of gun control, studies in college, and majors in women’s history.

Hayley will go into a rage if someone breaks up with her, meaning a man cannot safely end a relationship with her, unless she breaks up with the man. This rampage has also shown that she possesses incredible superhuman strength and is incapable of stopping altogether until she's been completely sedated. To the point she will burn things, destroy everything around her, and act like King Kong by climbing and breaking things. Hayley is a talented guitarist and singer; oddly, all of her family is amazing at singing.

Despite being fully obligated to women's rights, she is an excellent pie baker, going as far as to wear a 1950's housewife dress, taking up the moniker of Carlotta Monterrey to disguise herself.

Hayley has shot her father three different times, but in all honesty all of her family members have shot each other at one point or another. Also she is possibly infertile after many years of exposure to the goo during her fake family vacations that she wasn’t aware of.

Her family are all crazy in their own way but compared to all of them Haley is the most “level headed” but she’s still just as odd as her family.

She usually wears hemp made beige bras and panties with a peace symbol on the front and back. She also has a bellybutton ring.

Her room has pink walls with a nice magenta carpet. The blanket on her bed is also pink and her pillows are white. She has a circular nightstand with a landline phone next to her bed a computer and desk at the end of her bed that is at the corner of the room, and a couple of hippie posters on her wall and a closet.

Her lips are plump and she has a button nose.