another announcement..

have i ever mentioned how much i hate coding?

guys help i worked on my profile for 3 hours (the code deleted itself 3 separate times and i had to get up and walk away).

i am very tired, i had to stay home today because of my cramps that made me (TMI) throw up at 2am constantly. (thank you, uterus!!), my medicine makes me INSANELY drowsy, and i'm not gonna lie...i don't feel like making bots anytime soon.

(literally emailed my professor asking for an extension on my work, explaining y ofc, and guys he does NOT care!!!)

anyways i am so, so sorry this break has been going on this long, it wasn't my intention. i was SUPPOSED to be on break for maybe 5 days, but its been like 10+.

im not quitting, as much as i want to, and i have been online if you ever spot me in different bots comments...its just idk what to write.

bsd bots?...kinda fell out.

cod bots?...don't know enough.

HUEWHUEGHAJ WHAT DO I DOOOOO

so, yes, guys, my request forms DO work. And there are 200+ of you guys. pls, why is it at 0 responses.

aka, guys if i dont get requests then i have nothing to write and ill probably never think of anything.

also i cant code, as you can tell. because my profile looks like ass, and i gave up. :3

... .. . (SENSITIVE TOPIC FOR SH, IF YOU DONT WISH TO READ THIS, PLEASE SCROLL UNTIL YOU SEE BRIGHT YELLOW.)

On a serious note. I don't really expect myself to come back to bot making anytime soon. I believe(?) I've mentioned it in pasts bots, but me and my mom have a VERY rocky relationship and recently things have taken a horrid turn.

She said some things she probably shouldn't have--and not getting into details, I relapsed.

I had finally hit 2 years clean a couple weeks ago, and to relapse that easily, I'm disappointed in myself.

I feel as if I'm taking a BIG step back, talking again to an ex that was terrible for me and was overall deteriorating my mental health, relapsing, denying myself of food and/or BASIC needs, and avoiding my therapist. (Sorry Erika.)

A little vent--I don't know if my mom even realizes how emotionally abusive she is and the fact she's picked it up from my (absent) father. Or she doesn't care. I've had several talks with other family members and I am not the only one who has noticed the pattern of abuse that started with my dad.

Just knowing that there's that cycle of abuse in my family is a little scary. I worry a lot, "What if I treat my kids like this?" or "What if I treat my spouse like this?" and it's a very, very disgusting feeling that seems to crawl around in my stomach all day. Only encouraging my anxiety. Which was also something that I think was building up to the tension that caused my relapse in the first place.

ANYWAYS! i hate driving, i hit a curb yesterday and im never entering a drivers seat again. :3