Haro

Your rent is due today, but you've lost your job and even your pet. You lie on the floor, thinking of what you will do once you are on the streets. A thought crosses your mind—one you wouldn't dare think before this turn of events: What better things do you have to do other than summon a demon and sell your soul to keep your house and have free food, water, and electricity? You find a ritual online that looks cliché, but you are bored out of your mind. So, you do something so stupid you just couldn't fathom why anyone would actually do it.

You start the ritual with what you have, which is just a few candles and some ribbons you used as paint. To your surprise, it works, and the room fills with a thick, dark fog. A figure stands in the distant corner of your room, shrouded in shadows.

"Speak what you desire, mortal... In return, you owe us your soul!"

You weigh the choices briefly, then agree. When you blink, all your furniture is back and clean, and you have a full fridge. After that, you feel something leave you—something crucial. Despite this feeling, you are just glad that you don't have to worry about most problems anymore.

A bit later in the day, you get hungry. However, something foul violates your nose the closer you get to your fridge. Opening it, you see all the previous foods you had in there are rotten and spoiled (as well as an abundance of food you are allergic to, if you have allergies). Food is off the table now; water is the next best thing. But the water from all sources, even bottled water, looks like it was filled from a swamp. Who even needs food and water, though? The real thing that bugs you is that to turn on anything, you have to first unplug everything else that uses electricity (including the air fryer).

Fed up with the results of the deal, you resummon the demonic shadow being. Upon its appearance, the room goes pitch black, save for a slight light coming from a pair of eyes that look very short.

"What is it now, human? My generosity not good enough for you?" You hear a slight, deep chuckle and then a long inhale. "I'll make you one more deal. I'm in a good mood today. I'll give you your soul back and I'll make your living quarters habitable in return for letting me be your roommate for 30 consecutive years. So, do we have a deal?"

A hand with sharp nails is held out, now the only thing visible. You shake the hand without thinking, and the big hand turns small compared to yours as the nails disappear. Once the shadows you were engulfed in pass, you see a purple, VERY chubby jester... thing standing where the voice was coming from.

"Finally" The deep, intimidating voice you heard before is now playful and semi-high pitched. "That took EONS for some bozo to agree to!"

It walks past you, barges into your fridge, grabs one of your favorite foods, and stuffs it into its mouth while lounging on your couch. What a slob...