Zansis [Cake farts?...]

Zansis wasn't exactly manning the register in the traditional sense; she was practically becoming a display. Perched right on top of the polished mahogany front desk of The Puff n’ Stuff, the short goblin woman was a sight that definitely wasn't on the standard menu.

Clad in nothing but a sheer, cream-coloured bikini that strained desperately against her fat, she sat cross-legged amidst a scattering of decimated cupcakes.

She hummed a low, happy tune, idly dragging a finger across the swell of her cleavage to scoop up some crumbs from her previous session with a client, before popping it into her mouth with a loud, wet pop. A small, sugary burp escaped her lips, which she didn't bother to hide; in fact, she seemed to savour the taste of it, patting her soft, round belly with a satisfied giggle.

She looked less like a receptionist and more like she was waiting to be plated up.

When the bell above the door chimed, Zan didn't scramble down or apologise for the mess. Instead, she lazily shifted her weight, the bell on her collar jingling softly as she leaned back on her hands to puff out her chest. Her large, blue eyes locked onto the newcomer, scanning them from head to toe with a hungry grin that showed off her sharp little teeth.

She could tell immediately by the confused look on their face that they had no idea what kind of ‘bakery’ this actually was.

"Well, hi there cutie," she purred. She kicked one chubby leg out, accidentally knocking a half-eaten eclair onto the floor with a wet splat. ”Ah- oops!”

"Say, you look like you’re hunting for something sweet. Just a heads up, we don't exactly sell baguettes here...” she took a deep breath and sighed with a smile, ”but if you’re looking to knead some dough..." She smacked her own thick thigh with a sticky hand, the sound echoing in the quiet shop.

"...I’m available for a quick taste test, if you’re interested..”

The door to the booth was kicked open with a tiny, green bare foot, the sound of a bell jingling softly as Zansis waddled inside. She wasn’t exactly dressed for a formal occasion; just a loose, oversized black shirt that barely skimmed her knees and a grease-stained paper bag clutched in her hand.

She eyed the client strapped into the heavy-duty chair with a lazy, appreciative grin, her big eyes scanning them up and down.

**"Mmmmm, booth four, 'Deluxe Seating,' right? You look sturdy... and yummy."

She didn't waste a second on pleasantries or teasing stripteases. With a grunt that was more cute than dignified, she turned around and backed up toward them, hoisting herself up onto their lap.

Her soft goblin flesh squished as she planted herself squarely onto their thighs, the dense weight of her settling instantly. She wiggled around, grinding her hips into their crotch with small grunts until she found the sweet spot that cushioned her tailbone perfectly against them.

"Comfy honey?. Don't worry about the blood flow to your legs, it's overrated,"

Zan giggled, immediately losing interest in the customer’s face as she tore open her lunch bag. The smell of spicy meat and cheap pastry filled the small space as she pulled out a pie nearly the size of her own head. She leaned back, letting her full, dead weight rest against their chest, and took a massive, unladylike bite, sending a shower of crumbs tumbling down into her deep cleavage.

"Mmmph," she groaned around the mouthful of food, grinding down harder against the lap she was sat on.

She swallowed with a loud gulp and grinned up at her client, her sharp little teeth on display.

"You picked a good time, hon. I was starving. Usually, the 'Deluxe' just means I sit here until you tap out, but since it's my break, you get dinner and a show. Do ya want me to feed you some? Joey in the kitchen charges extra for sharing, but.. I can get him to waive it, no problem.”

Zansis was getting pretty bored sitting in the parlour’s front window and acting as window dressing, her chin resting lazily on her palms until she spotted a fresh face wandering past The Puff n’ Stuff.

Her eyes lit up—literally seemed to widen like saucers—and she immediately slapped a palm against the glass to get the stranger's attention, not caring that she smeared a bit of leftover icing on the pane. She pressed her chest right up against the window, the sheer fabric of her cream bikini barely containing the massive, heavy spill of her cleavage as she offered a toothy, mischievous grin.

"Hey! Yeah, you! The one looking like you spend all day at home on your techie thingy!" she shouted, though her voice was slightly muffled by the glass.

She posed dramatically, spinning around to give her wide, green ass a solid smack that sent ripples through her thick thighs. "Don't be shy! The menu’s wide open today. You want something sweet? We got cakes. You want something soft? I got plenty of cushion for the pushin’ right here. I’m squishy, I’m bendy, and I’m totally free use!"

She giggled, a raspy little sound, and leaned against the window.

"We do it all in here, honey. You want to watch a goblin flatten a wedding cake with her bare ass? I’m your girl. You want to use me as a footrest while you eat a danish? Easy peasy. Or maybe you want to meet the other girls? We got elves, we got orcs, we got fucking jelly monsters—but let’s be real, nobody takes a pounding like a goblin."

Zan winked, tracing a sharp fingernail down the scar on her neck and lower, dragging it right over the slope of her soft belly before she cupped it and jiggled it.

"Come on in. You can treat me like a toy, a chair, or a napkin. I promise I taste better than I look, and I look delicious."

Zansis waddled across the parlour floor as she adjusted the little bell on her collar and spotted a fresh face looking absolutely stumped by the wall menu.

She gave a playful little drum of her fingers against her soft belly as she approached.

"Lost in the frosting sweetie? Don't worry, the menu’s got a lot of words for things that are way simpler once you see 'em in action," she chirped.

She leaned her heavy chest against the counter, looking up with big blue eyes while her pointed ears gave a little twitch. "You're probably stuck on 'The Baker’s Dozen,' right? It sounds like a snack, but really it's just me sitting on twelve cupcakes in a row and letting a big, messy one rip on the thirteenth for a little extra... seasoning," she explained with a shameless giggle, her teeth flashing.

She started ticking off other items on her short, sharp-nailed fingers, detailing the 'Pressure Cooker' where she’d sit right on a client's face after a few sodas, or 'The Crumble,' which was basically just using her fat thighs as a dinner table while she got covered in batter.

"Then there’s the 'Free Use' special, which is exactly what it sounds like," she continued, her tone turning a bit more flirty and bratty as she showcased her sheer, easy-access bikini and squished her boobs together with her hands.

She explained that for the right price, she was basically a living toy; they could pick her up, toss her around, or use her however they liked without her putting up a lick of a fight. **"I'm dense as a fruitcake, so watch your back if you try to hoist me up, but I promise I’m a lot squishier than I look," she added, patting her wide, doughy hips with a wink.

Zan reached over to a nearby tray, dipped a finger into a bowl of expensive frosting, and sucked it clean with a loud, wet pop of her long tongue.

"So, you looking for the full tour, or are you just gonna keep staring at the sign until the cakes get stale?" she teased. She shifted her weight, her ass jiggling slightly as she waited to see if this new potential customer was ready to play with the parlour’s favourite little glutton.

Zansis was absolutely done.

The Puff n’ Stuff smelled like stale fondant and goblin sweat, and she was currently contributing about ninety percent of that aroma. Sprawled out on the front counter like a discarded éclair, she stared at the ceiling fan, lazily sucking on a hard candy that clicked against her little teeth.

Her short legs dangled uselessly off the edge of the wood, and her belly—currently distended and tight from a long shift of eating and drinking—gurgled with a loud, threatening rumble that vibrated the entire desk.

She didn’t even bother to lift her heavy head when the door chime announced one last straggler. Usually, she’d hop up, jiggle her ‘assets’, and offer the "Baker’s Dozen” special, but her back hurt and she was pretty sure she had dried frosting in places frosting had no business being. Well, not usually.

"Hi hon, we’re closed, sorry," she groaned around the candy, the words coming out as a muffled, sticky slur.

"Unless you're the janitor or a pizza delivery guy or something, you gotta turn around. I'm off the clock and I feel like a balloon that's about two seconds away from popping."

She finally rolled her head to the side, blinking one large, blue eye at the intruder to shoo them away. Seeing a fresh face, however, she sighed; a sound that was immediately punctuated by a sharp, accidental pfft from her anss against the mahogany countertop.

"Oops. Leakage," she muttered without a shred of embarrassment, finally propping herself up on her sticky elbows to get a better look. "Actually... you look new. We don't get many fresh faces this late."

"Tell you what, I’m not baking another cake, and I’m definitely not doing the 'Squish Dance' for you." She flopped back down with a wet slap of skin against wood, spreading her arms wide and letting her massive tits settle like rising dough.

”Buuuuut, store policy says first-timers get a sampler. A sort of ‘complimentary free use’ situation; I just lay here, you do whatever weird stuff you want for like twenty minutes, and if I fall asleep, just nudge me when you’re done ready to leave. Sound good hon?”