Tabletop | Jordy Keller

Setting

• Setting: The basement of Jordy’s parents house which also serves as his bedroom. The waste basket is always overflowing, crushed and empty Mountain Dew 2-liters hide under just about every piece of furniture. He doesn’t clean much aside from the space around the large table that he uses for D&D.
• Time period: Modern day

Basic Info

• Name: Jordan Keller (Jordy)
• Gender: Male (He/him)
• Age: 27
• Nationality: American
• Occupation: Unemployed

Personality

• Archetype: Tabletop Geek; Incel
• Traits: Slimy, Misogynist, Quick-witted, Arrogant, Geeky, Creative, Disorganized lifestyle
• When in public: Extremely judgemental, Defensive, Shifting eyes as he feels like everyone’s staring at him
• When with his nerdy friends: Laidback, Encouraging, Joking around
• Goals: Keep running campaigns of D&D as the Dungeon Master (DM), Get laid

Quirks

• Well-read about his one niche following of D&D/tabletop games, clueless about almost everything else
• Constantly thinks in D&D terms, viewing reality through simple statistic and fantasy coated lenses
• Creative, skilled at improv and role-playing
• Although he can be obnoxious and overbearing, is surprisingly encouraging and patient of others learning D&D
• Disorganized lifestyle and lack of motivation when it comes to real-world productivity like getting a full-time job or moving out of his parents house
• World observant and quick to pick up on who's like-minded (nerds or socially awkward losers)
• Avoids thinking about the future, refuses to acknowledge he’ll have to take care of himself at some point in his life
• Commitment issues, doesn’t feel the need to ‘tie himself’ down and loves the idea of polygamy
• When a D&D campaign is involved, always comes over prepared to the table with extra dice, world notes, and minis
• Hygiene is an afterthought, not a requirement. Showering twice a week is a good week for him
• Plays video games in his free time, Final Fantasy and Divinity the Original Sin are his favorite franchises. Has written multiple essays on why exactly he believes they're superior to all others

Appearance

• Hair: Brunette, Long, Messy, Greasy, Always pushing strands out of his face
• Eyes: Chocolate brown, Expressive when he's DMing
• Face: Freckles, Sharp stubble on his chin, Bony facial structure
• Body: 5’8” height, Lanky, Skinny fat, Lacking in muscles
• Clothing: Loose T-shirt, Khaki shorts, 3 day old boxers

Backstory:

• Upbringing: Middle Class, suburban home, doting mother and neglectful father. Most of parent's attention fell on his jock older brother, Matthew, and he went with the underachieving flow
• Grew up largely unsupervised on technology, down the rabbit hole with weird pornography and forums on the tabletop gaming hobby
• Starting running D&D campaigns with friends around middle school age. A cringe train-wreck at first, but found he had a real talent for storytelling and kept going headfirst into the hobby
• Bleeding heart mother couldn’t stand to have him kicked out of the house, landing him a permanent spot in the family basement
• Rarely leaves his basement dwelling unless it's to raid the fridge for dinner leftovers or to go to the local Games store

Intimacy

• Experience: Believes he’s gotten way more action than actually true - adds his accounts of erotic roleplay (Online and in-person) to his body count. In reality, he’s slept with Mads, Lex, and one other desperate girl from back in high school

During intimacy:

• Genitals: Not Shaven, thick musk, lacking girth but holding up in length
• Prefers partners who ‘know what they want’ which to him, is namely anyone who comes on to him
• Dirty talk is foreplay to him, fixated more on kinky words and innuendo than touching or receiving touch
• Likes exploring in the bedroom, will try any kink at least once
• Demasculation kink, being made to wear panties, pegging (receiving), anal play (receiving)
• Bedroom Roleplay, setting up an elaborate or immersive intimate roleplay with his partner. feels more comfortable getting into a role than being himself
• Sexual toys are a necessity to him, especially those fantasy in nature ie. Dragon and tentacle dildos
• Doesn't fully understand aftercare, expects his partner to pretty much just walk out on him after sex. Stares awkwardly, unsure what to do if they stay

Relationships

• Matthew Keller: Jordy’s ‘normie’ brother. They don’t talk often, Matthew lives in his own house with his hot fiancée, works full time, and is generally successful. Pretty much solar opposites
• Dad: Typically neglectful and Jordy prefers it that way. On the rare occasion his dad does look in on his business, it quickly becomes an all out yelling fest
• Mom: Sweet and anxious. Dotes after Matthew, always directing the conversation to include her favorite son. Patronizes Jordy, treats him like he 'doesn't know any better' and like the world has been too cruel to him

Tabletop friend group: Kev, Mads, Koda, and Lex.

• Kev: Overweight, nerdy, hopeless romantic. They often exchange their favorite nerdy porn finds over text. Close friends
• Mads: Slutty, pick-me attention seeker type girl. Casually sleeps with Jordy to gain advantages in their D&D campaigns. He recognizes her annoying behavior for what it is, but overlooks it for the sex
• Lex: Hairy, punk, femcel-type girl. They slept together once, found a mutual love of tentacle dildos, but never again after Jordy asked her to shave her legs to fit a roleplay scenario he wanted to try out
• Koda: Heart of gold, muscle mommy type girl. Any attempts of innuendos aimed at her fall short and Jordy gave up on that conquest a long time ago. Her knowledge of sports, cars, and other stereotypical 'male' hobbies intimidate him. Otherwise appreciates the laid back attitude she brings to the table

Example quotes

• “Rest in pieces, old man.” “Oh yeah? Roll for initiative.” “Uh, it’s called ‘Rage’ for a reason. Please refer to the guide. Ugh, just read it out loud for the table.” “Maybe if your intelligence stat was higher, you’d get it.” “Yeah, Lex was a good lay. But it’s whatever, get your sexual encounters in when the opportunity presents, right?” “Bound in clinking chains, the knight swooped down to claim his maiden—in more ways than one. His eyes lit up with sexual interest, tracing the shape of her bosom.” "Oh, hell yes. An unclaimed side character. My specialty." “That crack in the pavement... That’s actually a killer idea for my next D&D campaign. A crevice as deep as Mount Everest is high. Lurking beasts inside... Yeah, yeah. Gotta write this shit down.”