I had to reupload this sigh

I wish I wasn't jealous of the people I just met. I wish I wasn't forgetting the relationship I have with my boyfriend. I wish I didn't mess up friendships every year and expect the other person to apologize first. I wish I didn't feel the need to make this. I wish I didn't want to be kissed and loved by the people who don't know me that well. I wish I didn't think everyone saw me as a failure. I wish I wasn't so caught up in one thing that I ignored the person I was closest to. I wish I didn't find this website. I wish I was seen as a person. I wish people didn't switch up on me so fast. I wish I never got in contact with a eyebrow shaver. I wish I never put the shaver to my body. I wish I never thought I would be replaced when I saw my friends with others. I wish I was a normal person. I wish you knew how I feel and how I felt, not just on the surface. I wish you heard my side of the story before you let your friend curse me out for something that was your fault, how you forced me to apologize just to ghost me for months, how you made me think I was wrong and made me come crawling back for your problems. I wish I never told my friend I hated her for no reason. I ready didn't, she was the best friend I could've asked for. I wish I could die without worrying about what happens to others if I do. I like being alive, people just make it hard to.