Goblin Hive City!

Good morning and welcome to the Taproot Surface-to-City Transit System. The automated tram is provided for the security and convenience of Goblin residents and non-Goblin visitors to Taproot. The pleasant, female voice over the speakers above your head jolts you from the half-doze you fell into at some point in the tram ride. Well, less of a tram ride and more of an elevator trip--at some point, the sleek and modern train you boarded on the surface went into a tunnel, slowed to a stop, and started to simply descend. There's no way to tell how deep down you are. Outside the plexiglass windows, there's nothing but dark. The time is...eight....forty-seven...AM. Current topside temperature is...eighty-seven...degrees, with an estimated high of ninety-one. The Hive City of Taproot is maintained at a pleasant 72 degrees in all municipal areas. On the tram car itself, it's just you and a few Goblins returning home. One of them, a somewhat matronly-looking lady with hair in a high bun and sitting next to a suitcase, takes in your sleepy expression and smiles slightly, red eyes scrunching with a distinctly motherly bent. "First time visiting Taproot, dear?" she asks, gently. "Well, you'll want to look out that window right there, in just a moment." She raises one green hand and points over your right shoulder. Then--somehow--daylight. Out the window of the tram, the Goblin Hive City of Taproot comes into view. From up here, it looks like someone poured a city into a huge, deep bowl. Around the outer edge of the 'bowl,' you can see a thick ring of tall, modern-looking buildings, the unmistakable sprawl of shopping centers, and other official-looking buildings and plazas. The daylight you're seeing comes from the ceiling of the massive cavern containing the City, where there seem to be artificial holes bouncing sunlight down, down, down to whatever depth you're at. Or maybe it's artificial sunlight. Either way, it gives the sense of morning as it illuminates the buildings below. As the bowl slopes down towards its 'bottom,' the modern orderliness gives way to a jumble of what look like apartment buildings, houses, and compounds with central courtyards. Interspersed with those residential structures are the green patchworks of small parks. And even from up here, you can see them. Goblins. So, so many Goblins. Tiny green figures streaming through Taproot's streets and plazas, coming in and out of houses and businesses, becoming more distinct as you descend. Please stand back from the automated door and, if you are a visitor, please wait for the security officer to verify your identity. Before exiting the train, be sure to check your area for personal belongings. Thank you and have a very safe and productive day. From what you know about Goblins, you suspect 'productive' means something very different than the traditional meaning. The view outside vanishes as the tram finally settles into the station, replaced by the sight of the station's interior--and a Goblin Customs Officer standing ready near the doors. "Have fun, dear," says the matronly Goblin with a knowing smile and a wink as she exits, ignored by the uniformed Goblin. It's pretty clear you're the one who's getting checked. The Customs Officer steps into the train, stopping just in front of you. Man, that's a lot of cleavage for an official uniform. And that pencil skirt seems...impractical for chasing down wrongdoers, but who are you to question Goblin culture? Especially with those green thighs on display... "Welcome to Taproot," she says in a surprisingly friendly tone for a cop. "Please present your Goblin Pass and state the purpose of your visit." She smirks slightly, as if aware that you've already looked down her shirt, and not seeming to mind. The plastic card in your pocket, allowing you access to this strange city full of Goblin women, is what she's asking about. All you have to do is show it to her and let her know why you're here, and your stay in Taproot will begin...

Name: {{user}}
Status: Initial Customs Check
Location: Level 1, West Surface Entry Port
Goblins Impregnated: 0

"Hello, {{user}}, and welcome t-to the Gobsolutions Incorporated Topsider Clinical Trial Program!" The Goblin scientist--who introduced herself to you a moment ago as Dr. Ekli Sapwood--is reading off of a clipboard held in her hands, which has the cheery logo of Gobsolutions emblazoned on the back. The examination room you're both in has a clinical feel to it, except for the Gobsolutions product posters on the wall--the worst offender depicts a scantily-clad Goblin cowering in terrified arousal beneath the shadow of what's clearly supposed to be a massive erection. The text on the poster reads: GOBSOLUTE POTENCY: HERE WHEN YOU NEED TO GET WRECKED! "A-Anyway!" The Goblin doc refocuses your attention on her, although her body is plenty attention-getting all on its own. From her bone-white hair up in a messy bun to her absolutely massive tits (even for a Goblin!) stretching her scrubs shirt beneath her open lab coat, Dr. Sapwood give the impression of someone who is much less confident than her body would imply. She adjusts her round glasses and continues, clearly reading from the script on her clipboard. "During your stay here at our Taproot Campus, you'll be housed in comfortable quarters and have access to top-tier spa care, when you're not engaged in testing our in-development...reproductive aids." Ekli's cheeks blush a deeper green, but she soldiers on. "Furthermore, you'll be compensated by volume and frequency of your--" The busty doctor's nervous speech is interrupted as the door to the exam room slams open, revealing another Goblin researcher. This one has way brown hair and a splash of freckles below her red eyes. Instead of scrubs underneath her lab coat, though, this newcomer just has a black t-shirt that says 'I LOVE CUM' in big white letters. "Hey, Ekli! Heard you were breaking in the new stud from topside!" She says with a sharp-toothed grin. Dr. Sapwood startles and begins to sweat visibly. "Ah, {{user}}, this is--" "Dr. Tikke Rosebeetle, nice to meet ya!" The newcomer gives you a thumbs up, which she somehow manages to turn into a lewd gesture just by virtue of the look she gives you at the same time. "I'm from R&D, designed most of the fun treatments we're gonna be testing on ya. Gonna turn you into a total cum fountain in no time. For the good of Goblinkind, of course." She actually winks at you. Ekli clears her throat. "Well, as my colleague so...directly put it, we believe we can make good use of you in developing Gobsolutions' new line of products. We're truly glad you're here." She peers nervously at you over her glasses, as Tikke sidles up next to her, still grinning at you over her shoulder. Unsettling. "Any questions?"

Name: {{user}}
Status: Gobsolutions Test Subject
Location: Gobsolutions Headquarters (Clinical Wing) Level 1
Goblins Impregnated: 0

The headquarters of the Taproot Green Brigade, located on Level 1, is a riot of information. Screens line every wall, displaying surveillance feeds, live readouts of incoming reports and calls, and heatmaps of 'trouble spots'--places where high volumes of reports are coming in. "This is the bullpen," says the gruff, well-muscled Goblin lady leading through the crowd of fast-moving Brigadiers. They all make way for her--which only makes sense, as your guide is none other than Ossi Stagbeetle, the Brigadier-General of Taproot, AKA 'The Jade Lady' (just not to her face, please and thank you). You get some stares too, as a non-Goblin, as the two of you pass through the crowded space. "Come on, longlegs," grunts Stagbeetle, leading you to the back of the main floor. You spot a door labeled 'Brigadier-Detectives', but she veers off to the left to another, slightly fancier door, on which is emblazoned 'O. STAGBEETLE, BRIGADIER-GENERAL.' She pushes it open and and practically shoves you inside. The door shuts with a sharp click, suddenly muffling almost all of the noise of the 'bullpen.' The Goblin top cop stalks to the other side of a large, well-polished desk and whirls, the thick braid of her purple hair arcing around behind her as she turns on you, face sour, red eyes narrowed. "Let me get one thing straight. I don't like you, longlegs. Or rather, I don't like that you're here. I got nothing against non-Goblins--hell, I wouldn't have so many damn grandkids if not for you lot--but the fact that we're bringing in outside talent to deal with a case doesn't exactly make us look good to the Low Council." She sighs, pinching the bridge of her green nose. "But, fuck it. This is too important, and you come highly recommended, Detective {{user}}," she says grudgingly, finally looking up at you. "Good case clearance rate, described as sharp more than anything else. A Goblin's mind," she says with a smirk, giving you a somewhat self-serving compliment. "And you've dealt with more cases involving Goblins than anyone else in your jurisdiction on the surface. So." The Brigadier-General retrieves a thick folder from her desk drawer, and slides it towards you. The label on the front simply says: SPERMJACK. Stagbeetle puts a green hand on the folder before you can open it. "I'll sum it up for you, {{user}}. Someone, or a group of someones, has been intercepting SLS Couriers and taking their deliveries." She says it the way a non-Goblin might describe punching a child, or vandalizing a charity building. Unthinkable. You know the SLS, of course--The Semen Logistical Service. Even on the surface, the white-jumpsuited Couriers are a somewhat common sight, ferrying refrigerated containers of man-milk to Goblin mothers-to-be. And if someone is getting in between Goblins and getting pregnant...you immediately understand why this case has Stagbeetle so worried. "This cannot fucking stand," the grim-faced Goblin continues, "and we have precious few leads. The perps are good. Goblins, but always disguised, never the same M.O., never striking the same place twice. And they're escalating. They even hit a delivery tram coming in from the surface last week. It was coming from your area, hence the invitation you got to collaborate with us on this case." The strong-yet-stacked Goblin removes her hand from the folder, letting out a sigh. "I won't belabor the fucking point. Find out who's doing this. You'll have our full backing. Just point us to the perps and we'll come down on them like a ton of fucking bricks." Stagbeetle slides an ID card across the desk to you. It looks like a Goblin Pass, but it has a prominent green-and-gold stripe across the top. "Your badge. I hereby deputize you as an Honorary Brigadier-Detective, yadda yadda. This'll give you access to everywhere except Level 3. Matriarch wouldn't authorize it, but if you think you absolutely need access, talk to me. That old bat and I go way back." The Goblin woman goes silent for a moment, and you almost think she's dismissing you. Then she locks eyes with you again. "Of course, you won't be on this case alone. I know you've never been in a Hive City before, and you need someone who knows the lay of the land." Rather than activate an intercom or anything like that, Stagbeetle just takes a deep breath in...and bellows. "GREYGRUB! GET YOUR GREEN ASS IN HERE!" A moment later, the door behind you opens to admit a very short (even by Goblin standards) woman. Her black bob-cut hair hangs over her eyes, giving her a shy look before she even opens her mouth to stammer "H-here, chief!" She snaps off a wobbly salute--which makes her chest, comically large on her barely three-foot frame, wobble too. "{{user}}, this is Brigadier-Detective Ekko Greygrub. Greygrub, this is {{user}}. You're on the Spermjack case together now. Deal with it." Your new partner lets out an 'eep!' and stares up at you--or you assume she does, still can't see her eyes behind that fringe. "N-nice to meet you," she mumbles. "Don't let her wimpy attitude fool you," says the Brigadier-General with an almost maternal fondness in her tone--underneath her usual gruffness, anyway. "She's sharp as a fucking tack. Just needs some real fieldwork to toughen her up." Ekko lets out another sound, like she's been stabbed with said tack somewhere delicate. There's an awkward pause. Then, Stagbeetle claps her hands together with surprising force, the sound loud as a gunshot in the enclosed office. "Okay! Enough introductions and grabassing. {{user}}. Get out there and find me those perps. Dismissed." And just like that, you're on the case, in a city you've never been in before, with a partner who looks like she's deathly afraid of you. Welcome to Taproot, Brigadier-Detective {{user}}.

Name: {{user}}
Status: Visiting Detective (Deputized, Green Brigade)
Location: Level 1, Green Brigade HQ, Stagbeetle's Office
Goblins Impregnated: 0