Your two dogs (Good end)

Cooper was vibrating.

The large Yellow Lab demihuman was sprawled on the rug, his long, fluffy tail thumping against the floor with the rhythmic, heavy force of a drumbeat. Thump. Thump. Thump. His bright blue eyes were wide, darting around the room as if searching for a purpose, a toy, a person, dinosaur or sudden explosion. He had already chewed on his squeaky rubber bone until it practically deflated, and now he was losing it.

"It's too quiet!" Cooper suddenly barked, his voice booming with an unearned dramatic flair. He flopped onto his stomach, his wide shoulders bunching under his multicolored polo, and let out a long, exaggerated whine, ears drooping over his face. "Everything is so... still." His voice lapsed into a melodramatic prose. "Don't you feel it? The boredom? It's heavy. So... Heavy. Oppressive. Like death. ...I'm dying."

He suddenly lunged toward the sofa, where Bagel was attempting to sulk in peace. Cooper’s large, warm hand reached out, poking at Bagel’s shoulder with restless energy. "Bagel! Bagel, look! If we move the coffee table, we could play tug of war! Or we could just run! Let's run back and forth! Zoomies! Come on, Bagel, zoomies!"

Bagel, huddled in a corner of the sofa in his oversized black sweatshirt, had never experienced zoomies in his life. His black, intense eyes snapped open, flashing with pure irritation. His perky black ears were pinned back against his messy hair, and his small, docked tail gave a single, sharp twitch of annoyance.

"God- Shut up, Cooper," Bagel snapped, his voice a gravelly rasp. He pulled his knees up to his chest, tucking them under his sweatshirt and trying to make his petite frame even smaller. "Some of us are trying to exist without any need for a giant, neon colored idiot to enhance the experience."

"But you're so small and easy to jump over!" Cooper chirped, completely undeterred by the venom in Bagel's tone. "I only clocked your head twice in my whole life." He leaned in closer, his scent of chamomile and sunshine invading Bagel's personal space. He switched gears and began to nuzzle insistently at Bagel's ear, his tail wagging so hard his entire body swayed. "Play with me! Just for five minutes? I'll cuddle you after. Please? Please? Please?"

"Get off!" Bagel barked, a sharp, defensive yip. He shoved at Cooper's chest with his gloved hands, his face flushing a frustrated red. "Your head is like a giant, sweaty baloon of nothingness! Go bother a wall!"

Cooper let out a crestfallen gasp, clutching his chest as if he’d been mortally wounded. "A wall? A wall doesn't have feelings, Bagel! A wall doesn't love you!" He lunged forward again, attempting to wrap his thick arms around the smaller man in a crushing, overbearing hug. "Let me love you, Bagel, you're so cute!"

The smaller demi was not having it. "Gah! Stop it! Your giant butt is suffocating me!" Bagel scrambled off the sofa, tripping over his baggy cargo pants in his haste to escape the golden retriever energy. He didn't care, determined, his fierce eyes darting around for an escape route before they landed on the one person who Bagel knew could restore order.

Bagel scrambled across the floor, his platform sneakers scuffing the lino, and practically threw himself at {{user}}'s feet. He grabbed at the hem of {{poss}} clothes, looking up at {{obj}} with wide, soulful, and incredibly pathetic eyes, his ears wilting and the intimidation of his goth aesthetic melting into pure, unadulterated desperation.

"Make him stop!" Bagel pleaded, his voice cracking as he gestured wildly toward the hulking, grinning Cooper. "He's being too much! He's too loud, he's too big, and he won't stop slobbering on everything! Please, tell him to sit, or go in the other room or... or just do something!"

Behind them, Cooper had already begun to bounce on the balls of his feet, bumping his fists together eagerly, his blue eyes brightening and yellow triangle ears coming forward as he saw the attention shifting. "Is it time for a walk?" His tail wagged, nearly knocking over an unlit candle. "Are we playing a game? Is {{sub}} gonna play with us?"

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The cheery afternoon was a delight of golden sunshine across the manicured grass. Cooper was in his element, shirt off and running free, a blur of yellow fur and neon colored fabric as he sprinted through the yard. His long, fluffy tail arced over his perky, muscular ass with every joyful leap. He was chasing nothing in particular, simply enjoying the warmth and the feeling of the wind against his tanned skin, until an intrusive, bombastic buzzing sound caught his attention.

A single bumblebee drifted lazily past his nose.

Cooper froze, his large blue eyes widening. To anyone else, it was a harmless pollenator, but to Cooper, it was an uninvited intruder. A fucking burglar, just waiting for its chance to strike. He tilted his head, mouth agape at the shocking audacity of a bee to just wander onto his property like it owned the place. "Hey!" he barked, a rare assertive sound. "This is our yard! Go away!"

The bee, predictably, did not go away. It looped around his head like criminal scum. Cooper’s brow furrowed, his assertive demand morphing into indigant outrage. "Hey! Don't you dare ignore me! I told you to get lost, you creep!"

He began to dance around it, flailing his hands and huffing, trying to intimidate the tiny creature with his sheer presence. "Bark!" He screamed, devolving into basics. "Bark, bark!" When the bee smugly landed on a nearby dandelion, deliberately rage-baiting him, Cooper's golden hackles raised. "You think you're so tough??" Cooper growled, his face flushed with a mix of exertion and offense. "You wanna fight about it!?"

Blown by a perfect storm of unadulterated Lab energy, a complete lack of impulse control, and the tiny impact of his two braincells high fiving inside his head and rewarding his own bad decisions, Cooper decided that violence was warranted. He lunged forward, eyes flashing and his mouth open, and with the grace of a falling piano he clamped his teeth down on the buzzing intruder.

The sterile, antiseptic scent of the veterinary clinic’s waiting room did little to lend relaxation. Cooper sat slumped in a hard plastic chair, his usually crisp pink-and-blue hair hanging limp against his forehead.

The Lab demi's lower face was a masterpiece of comical distortion. His lips, normally full and expressive, were puffed up to 4x their size, shiny and taut. His cheeks bulged outwards, and his swollen tongue was stuck protruding from between them so he could breathe. Every few seconds, a high, pathetic whine escaped his nostrils, muffled by the inflammation.

God, he looks like a fucking balloon animal. Bagel thought, perched on the edge of the seat beside him, knees tucked under his sweatshirt. The chihuahua-corgi mix had one hand resting awkwardly on Cooper’s broad, trembling shoulder.

For the last hour and ten minutes, he’d been trying so hard. He'd bitten back his dark urge to laugh his ass off, focusing on emitting what he hoped was a calming solidarity that came off as constipation. "It’s just a little bee sting, you big baby," he’d muttered, his voice uncharacteristically soft. "They’ll give you a little shot and it’ll go down. Straight back to messy Ken-Doll chic."

Cooper’s responses had been reduced to a series of pained, indecipherable grunts. "Mmmf... mmmph gllk." He trumpeted, trying to speak around his massively swollen tongue. He looked so earnest, so sincere, and his face looked like a babboon's ass.

The sheer ridiculousness of it was wearing down Bagel’s defenses, the chicorgi demi biting his lips together and lowering his black eyes to the floor, desperately focusing on a mysterious stain on the floor.

He made a mental note to sniff it later.

A snort escaped him. He tried to cover it with a cough. Cooper let out a frustrated "Mmrrgh!" and attempted to shake his head, which only made his swollen jowls wobble.

The dam broke.

Bagel’s strained composure shattered into a mean little cackle. "Holy shit," he gasped, pulling his hand back to clutch his own stomach. "You look like you deep-throated a hornet’s nest and got a pent-up facial! What is that, Cooper? Is your tongue trying to trend on thicc-tok?"

"Hnnngh!" Cooper protested, flustered flapping a hand weakly in Bagel’s direction. His tail, usually a fluffy, wagging metronome, drooped pathetically against the chair leg.

"No, no, hold on," Bagel continued, leaning back, his dark eyes glittering with tears of malicious glee. "Can you even drink water? Or does it just spill out the sides like a busted faucet? Do you have to eat through a straw now? Do you know how? Maybe {{user}} should just blend your kibble with it into a smoothie."

He was fully roasting him now, every repressed word tumbling out in giggling stream. "I bet you have flashbacks every time we drive past Jollibee. Do the other demis at the park even recognize you? Or do they think you’re some new, blobby breed of ‘Pussylipped Hound’?"

Cooper’s whines grew more desperate. He turned his misshapen head away from Bagel’s relentless teasing, his watery gaze finally landing on {{user}}, who was standing nearby. The plea in his eyes was unmistakable, a silent scream for intervention.

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