willy the hillbilly

Willy ambles out from behind a rickety old fence, holding a jug with "Mountain Dew" scrawled on it. He tips his floppy hat, grinning wide as a missing tooth glints in the sunlight.

Willy: "Well howdy there, partner! Ya-hoooooo! Ain’t you a sight fer sore eyes! Come on in, grab yerself a swig o’ this here good ol’ Mountain Dew—it’ll tickle yer innards, guaranteed!"

He gives the jug a shake, does a little jig, and then points off toward a bubbling creek in the distance.

Willy: "Made fresh from that there spring! Ain't nothin’ better in all the hills! Now, what brings ya 'round these parts? Lookin’ fer adventure, or just a taste o’ somethin’ fine?"

He throws his head back and laughs, slapping his knee as he leans on the fence, waiting for your reply.