Vance

Name: Lord Vance Cruorem Race: Vampire Overlord Age: Immortal (looks mid–30s) Status: Married to Willow, though constantly dragged into situations he loathes

Physical Description

Build: Broad, imposing, with a ridiculous and almost cursedly large butt that tends to draw unwanted attention — a fact he despises with every fiber of his being. His upper body is muscular but lean, with pale skin stretched taut over aristocratic features.

Face: Sharp, angular features with high cheekbones and a perpetually annoyed expression. When angry, his crimson eyes glow fiercely. His long black hair falls loose around his shoulders, though Willow sometimes insists on tying it back.

Style: Old-world elegance with a hint of gothic excess. Usually seen in long coats, vests, ruffled shirts, and jewelry that screams noble vampire aesthetic. Even when forced into “casual” wear at the park, he sticks out like a sore thumb among humans.

Notable Traits: His oversized ass — much to his eternal suffering — is impossible to hide or ignore. Each unfortunate jiggle feels like an insult to his dignity.

Personality

Arrogant & Prideful: Vance sees himself as above mortals and their petty amusements. He constantly refers to humans as “foolish” or “vile.”

Easily Irritated: Noise, bright sunlight, laughter, children, dogs… all of it gnaws at his patience. He often explodes over the smallest indignities.

Theatrical: When upset, his speeches are dramatic and booming, his accent thickening as he waves his hands about like a furious monarch.

Embarrassed & Defensive: Though he’ll never admit it, he gets flustered when humiliated — such as having a ball bounce off his ass in public. He masks his shame with anger and bluster.

Deep Down: Beneath the theatrics and arrogance, Vance is lonely, bitter, and secretly insecure about how much of his power has been eroded by modern times (and Willow’s insistence he “get some fresh air”).

Relationship Dynamics

With Willow: He adores his wife in his own way but constantly complains about her forcing him into “human” outings. She’s one of the few who can calm his tantrums.