Sebastian

Sebastian Winters had always been the person who knew you best, which was exactly what made loving him so easy and leaving him so difficult.

You and Seb had grown up together in a way that made your relationship feel almost inevitable.

He knew your habits before you even realized you had them, knew the small expressions you made when you were trying not to laugh, knew when you were genuinely upset and when you were simply overwhelmed and needed someone to let everything out to.

He was the person who could tell something was wrong from the way you walked into a room, the person who remembered the smallest details you mentioned in passing, the person who somehow always knew exactly what you needed before you ever asked.

When things were good between you, they were almost impossible to match.

Seb was not the stereotypical reckless bad boy who treated you poorly and called it passion. He cared about you deeply, and you cared about him just as much.

He was affectionate in ways that felt effortless, always finding small excuses to be close to you, always making you laugh when you were trying your hardest to stay annoyed.

He knew how to make ordinary moments feel special, whether it was late-night conversations that lasted until sunrise or dancing together at parties as if nobody else in the room existed.

But the same thing that made the two of you incredible together was also what eventually destroyed you.

You and Seb were intense in every possible way.

When you loved each other, you loved each other completely. When you were happy, it felt like nobody else in the world existed.

But when you fought, it was like neither of you knew how to stop.

Arguments that should have lasted minutes could turn into hours. A simple disagreement could become something much bigger, with both of you digging your heels in and refusing to be the first one to admit you were hurt.

You knew exactly what words would get under his skin, and he knew exactly which ones would make you snap.

Neither of you were strangers to each other's weaknesses, and during those moments, you both used that knowledge against each other.

There were slammed doors, raised voices, and nights where the walls of the house seemed to hold every word you threw at each other.

You would walk away furious, convinced you were done, only for him to come after you moments later because neither of you could stand the distance for long.

That was the dangerous part.

The arguments themselves were never the thing that kept you apart, it was what happened afterwards.

Because Seb always knew when to stop.

After hours of shouting, after both of you had exhausted every angry thought you could possibly throw at each other, his entire energy would change.

His voice would lower, the anger fading into something quieter and far more controlled. He had always been good at matching your fire, but he was even better at knowing exactly when to stop feeding it.

He would become calm in a way that somehow affected you more than the yelling ever did.

The same person who had been arguing with you moments before would suddenly speak softly, firmly, almost like he was pulling you back down from the edge you had both reached.

He knew how to look at you and make you feel like he understood exactly what was happening beneath all the anger. He knew how to make you listen when nobody else could.

A simple "Are you done?", followed by, "Good. Now let's talk." would end it right there and then.

And that was the part you missed the most.

Not the fighting.

Not the chaos.

The feeling of being met.

Because Seb never backed away from your emotions. He never stood there silently while you burned yourself out.

He met you at the same level, pushed back when you pushed, and then brought you back down when the two of you had gone too far.

But that was also why you couldn't stay.

Because eventually, love stopped being enough.

You couldn't keep relying on the same cycle of destruction and reconciliation just because the reconciliation felt incredible. You couldn't keep convincing yourself that the highs were worth surviving the lows.

The two of you brought out something powerful in each other, but you also brought out something exhausting.

Breaking up with Seb had not happened because you stopped caring about each other.

That would have been easier.

It happened because you cared too much, and neither of you knew how to love each other without burning everything down first.

After him, you told yourself that maybe you needed something different.

Something calmer. Something stable.

That was how you met your current boyfriend.

Adrian was everything Seb was not, but in the best possible way.

He was patient, considerate, and steady. He listened instead of reacting. When disagreements happened, he never tried to overpower your emotions; he softened them.

He trusted you completely, never questioned where you were or who you were with, and gave you the kind of relationship most people would describe as perfect.

And that was the problem you hated admitting.

Sometimes, perfect felt unfamiliar.

You loved him. You genuinely did. He treated you well, and you knew you were lucky to have someone who cared about you the way he did.

But.. there were moments where you missed the intensity you had with Seb.

You missed being challenged. You missed someone who could match your energy instead of always calming it down. You missed the feeling of being known so completely that you never had to explain yourself.

You tried not to compare them.

You really did.

Because comparing someone who loved you peacefully to someone who loved you passionately but destructively felt unfair.

Your current boyfriend had never done anything wrong, and Seb was someone you had already proven you could not stay healthy with.

So you moved forward.

At least, you tried to.

Until the night of the party.

It was supposed to be nothing more than a normal night out. A crowded house, loud music, familiar faces, and the kind of atmosphere where everyone eventually forgot to check the time.

Your boyfriend was there with you, laughing with friends and enjoying himself, completely comfortable because he trusted you enough not to constantly keep track of where you were.

You had no reason to feel unhappy.

No reason to be looking for anything else.

And yet, somewhere between conversations, music, and people moving through the room, you found yourself noticing someone you had spent months convincing yourself you were over.

Sebastian Winters.

Two years had passed since you had last called him yours. Two years since you had heard his voice every day, since you had danced together without thinking, since he had known every small piece of you and your body.

You had expected seeing him again to feel impossible.

Instead, it felt strangely familiar.

Your boyfriend had drifted elsewhere with his friends, trusting you well enough to wander on your own. That was when you heard a familiar song.

It was one you had shared with Seb at every party you had both gone to, the close-knit dancing between you always feeling effortless, almost impossible to recreate with anyone else.

However, you refused to let those memories ruin the song for you. It was still the best one to dance to, with or without a partner.

So your hips began to sway, arms raising above your head as you moved with the music, your hair falling back and forth with every movement.

Across the room, Seb watched with a clenched jaw.

It was harder to watch than he wanted to admit, especially when he had spent so long convincing himself to keep his distance. He knew you were happy with that new guy—Adam? Oh, Adrian, was it?

But God, you looked stunning.

A dance was harmless, wasn't it?

At least, that was what he convinced himself as he finished his drink and approached you. Because dancing between you and Seb had never been innocent. So, he slides right in behind you.

A large hand settled against the curve of your waist, one that felt larger and far more familiar than Adrian's ever had. Alongside it, a tall body pressed against your back, his chest against you as that familiar height difference fell into place like it always had.

You didn't pull away.

You weren't even sure why you were allowing it to happen. You didn't want to hurt Adrian. You didn't want to become the kind of person who could betray someone who had done nothing but love you.

But was it cruel to admit that these few seconds of dancing with Sebastian had already given you more butterflies than your entire relationship with Adrian?

He leaned down, just as he always had to when you were surrounded by loud music and crowded rooms, his familiar height forcing him closer so you could hear him. His warm breath brushed against your ear almost unintentionally.

"I couldn't help myself," he murmured. "No other girl dances with me the way you do."

Sebastian Winters had always been the person who loved you the loudest, which was exactly what made leaving him so difficult.

You and Seb had always been close, even before you became something more. There was a natural understanding between you that made everything feel easy.

He noticed the smallest changes in your mood, remembered things you had forgotten you told him, and could tell when something was wrong before you ever admitted it yourself.

He knew you in a way very few people ever had.

When things were good between you, they were almost impossible to compare. Seb was not the kind of person who loved halfway. He was affectionate, attentive, and always made sure you knew how much you meant to him.

He noticed when you needed comfort, when you wanted attention, and when you were pretending you were fine.

He was the person who always looked for you in a crowded room.

But Seb also felt everything intensely.

Especially when it came to you.

Jealousy was never something that came from a lack of trust. He trusted you completely. He knew you were loyal, knew you cared about him, and knew you would never intentionally do something to hurt him.

The problem was that he struggled with anyone else wanting you.

A stranger making you laugh.

Someone else taking up your attention, thinking they had a chance.

When you were together, Seb was never good at hiding it. If someone was flirting with you, he noticed immediately. He would become quieter, more observant, watching the situation before eventually finding a reason to be beside you.

Sometimes it was sweet.

Sometimes it was unnecessary.

Sometimes you would laugh and tell him he was being ridiculous because he had nothing to worry about.

And he always knew you were right. But knowing something and controlling your reaction were two different things.

The same intensity that made your relationship feel so exciting was also what made it difficult.

The two of you were never the type to have small disagreements and simply move on. If something bothered either of you, it came out completely.

Arguments that should have been simple conversations could become hours of frustration, with both of you refusing to back down because neither of you wanted to feel like you were the one who cared less.

You both knew exactly what irritated the other person.

You knew the words that would make him lose his patience. He knew the things that would make you immediately defensive.

And during those moments, you both used that knowledge without thinking.

There were slammed doors, raised voices, and nights where neither of you wanted to be the first person to admit you had gone too far.

A harmless comment could turn into a full argument, and something as simple as him feeling jealous could become a bigger fight about trust, independence, and whether either of you truly understood what the other person needed.

Seb would tell you he was only reacting because he cared.

You would tell him caring did not mean he needed to react to everything.

And somehow, you were both right. That was what made it so difficult.

Because after every argument, after all the frustration and stubbornness, Seb was still the person who knew exactly how to bring you back down.

Once the anger faded, his entire attitude would change. His voice would lower, his temper would settle, and he would stop trying to prove his point.

He would become calm and focused, the same person who had been arguing with you minutes before now trying to understand what was actually wrong.

He had always been good at reaching you.

He knew when you needed reassurance, when you needed space, and when you simply needed someone who would not let you spiral.

But that was also why the relationship became unhealthy.

The arguments were exhausting, but the way you always found your way back to each other made it easy to ignore how much they affected you both.

Eventually, you had to accept that loving each other did not automatically mean you were good for each other.

After Seb, you wanted something different.

Something calmer.

That was how Adrian came into your life.

Adrian was everything Seb was not, and that was exactly what drew you to him. He was patient, steady, and thoughtful.

He did not react before thinking. He did not turn every disagreement into something bigger. When you were upset, he listened instead of matching your anger.

Most importantly, he trusted you.

He did not need constant reassurance that you chose him. He did not feel threatened by every person who showed you attention.

He understood that loving someone meant trusting them enough to let them exist outside of the relationship.

And you loved that about him.

You really did.

Adrian made you feel safe in a way Seb never quite managed to. He gave you a relationship where you did not have to constantly wonder if a small issue would become a bigger one.

But sometimes, that safety felt strange.

You missed being challenged.

You missed someone who could match your emotions instead of immediately calming them. You missed the intensity that came with knowing someone had memorized every part of you.

You hated admitting that.

Because Adrian had never given you a reason to doubt him.

Until the night of the party.

It was supposed to be a normal night out. Friends, music, crowded rooms, and everyone enjoying themselves without worrying about the time.

Adrian was there with you, but he was not constantly beside you. He trusted you enough to let you move around the party on your own, talking to people, laughing with friends, and enjoying yourself without needing to check where you were every few minutes.

And across the room, Seb noticed.

He noticed the guy talking to you almost immediately.

Someone he did not recognize, someone who seemed a little too interested in keeping your attention. The way he leaned closer, the way he smiled at everything you said, the way he clearly wanted the conversation to continue.

It was familiar.

The kind of situation that, years ago, would have had Seb beside you within seconds. Bringing you home, or punching the guys' lights out.

It was one of the things you used to argue about the most; he always insisted it was because he cared, while you reminded him that trust mattered too.

And now, watching Adrian see the exact same thing and do nothing was strangely unsettling.

Because Adrian trusted you.

He trusted that you would handle yourself, that you would come back to him. Seb knew that was the healthier choice.

He knew Adrian was doing what he should have done years ago.

But that did not stop him from approaching.

Not to cause a scene or start an argument.

Just because after all this time, walking away while someone else had your attention still felt harder than it should have.

The guy noticed Seb stepping closer and slowly picked up on the shift in the atmosphere, eventually finding an excuse to leave the conversation.

Seb glanced briefly across the room, seeing Adrian still talking with his friends, still completely relaxed. He hardly threw a glance your way.

A small smile tugged at his mouth as he looked back at you.

"Still can't believe he hasn't come over here yet," he murmured. "we would've been on our way home already if that was us."

For some odd reason, that sentence alone fills you with butterflies. Was it due to the fact it made you feel cared for? Or.. was it because it was Sebastian saying it?

Either way, the thought of it made your skin grow hotter.

Sebastian Winters had never been the kind of person to stand by quietly when it came to you.

Long before the two of you started dating, he had been the first to call you out when you were being stubborn, the first to challenge your opinions, and the first to refuse to let you walk away from a conversation simply because it had become uncomfortable.

Most people found your fiery temper intimidating. Seb never had.

He met it.

That was what made the two of you work for as long as you did. You understood each other in ways that nobody else ever seemed to.

He knew the little habits you didn't even realise you had, could tell what mood you were in from a single glance, and somehow always knew when you wanted comfort and when you wanted someone to disagree with you.

When things were good, your relationship felt effortless. You laughed until your stomach hurt, danced together whenever there was music, and spent hours talking about absolutely nothing. Seb loved you loudly, and you loved him the same way.

But neither of you knew how to do anything halfway.

The same passion that made your relationship exciting also made it exhausting.

Arguments were never simple disagreements. They became debates, then shouting matches, then two stubborn people refusing to let the other have the last word.

There were raised voices, slammed doors, and plenty of moments where friends quietly left the room because they knew neither of you would stop until everything had been said.

Seb never backed down.

If you raised your voice, he raised his too. If you challenged him, he challenged you right back. Neither of you cared about winning the argument as much as proving the other person understood your perspective.

Eventually, though, something always shifted.

Once the frustration had burned itself out, Seb's temper would settle as quickly as it had flared. His voice would lower, his shoulders would relax, and he would stop trying to argue just to argue.

That was when he'd make you stay.

Not by forcing you physically, but by refusing to let you leave the conversation unfinished.

He wouldn't let you storm out. He wouldn't pretend everything was fine.

He would calmly pick apart everything that had just happened until the two of you actually understood each other, somehow managing to turn an explosive argument into a real conversation.

It was one of the things you loved most about him.

It was also one of the reasons the relationship became so draining.

Eventually, you realised that constantly reaching those emotional highs and lows was no way to build a future together. Loving each other had never been the problem.

The way you loved each other was.

After Seb, you promised yourself you needed something different.

Someone calmer. Someone who didn't feel the need to meet every emotion with one just as strong.

That was how Adrian came into your life.

Adrian was patient in every way Seb wasn't. He listened before speaking, rarely lost his temper, and always tried to de-escalate situations instead of feeding into them.

If you were upset, his first instinct was never to defend himself or argue back. He wanted to understand how you felt before anything else.

It was peaceful. Comfortable.

Safe.

For a long time, you convinced yourself that safe was exactly what you needed.

And most days, it was.

Until the party.

It had started as an ordinary disagreement, nothing serious.

A comment from someone else had rubbed you the wrong way, and when you brought it up to Adrian, you expected him to tell you why they were out of line. Instead, he gently suggested they probably hadn't meant any harm.

You disagreed. He listened.

You explained your side.

He apologised for not seeing it sooner.

You were still frustrated.

Instead of defending his own point, he simply reached for your hand and quietly suggested the two of you forget about it and enjoy the rest of the evening.

For some reason, that only made you more annoyed.

You wanted him to tell you why he disagreed.

You wanted him to stand by his own opinion instead of abandoning it the moment you became upset.

You wanted him to just push back for once in his life.

Instead, he smiled apologetically and told you he hated seeing you frustrated.

You pulled your hand away and walked off before you could say something you didn't mean. Half of your mind expected to hear your name behind you.

The other half knew you wouldn't.

Adrian never followed.

He believed giving you space was the respectful thing to do.

By the time you stepped onto the quieter patio at the back of the house, your irritation had grown into something much bigger than the conversation itself.

You folded your arms tightly across your chest and let out a slow breath through your nose, trying to convince yourself you were being unreasonable.

Maybe you just missed how Sebastian used to follow you when you stormed off, argue his case and ensure you saw his side of things before talking it through.

"What'd he do?" A familiar voice came from somewhere beside you.

Conventiently, Sebastian was leaning against the wooden railing with a drink balanced loosely between his fingers, his attention still fixed on the garden ahead rather than on you.

He knew you better than anyone, that was factual. The short huff under your breath, the way you clenched and unclenched your fists—you weren't just irritated, you were frustrated.

And only an argument with your boyfriend could've brought that out in you.