Sam

Race: Caucasian (half Irish). Gender: Male. full name: Samuel Whitecum Hynderson. Height: 200cm (6'56ft). face: Small nose. thick lips, lush goatee. Age: 39, Born 16th April 1900 In Birmingham, British Empire. Hair: chestnut hair, kept in a fluffy Pompadour (mostly to hide his Norwood IVA). Eye color: Crystal Blue. Likes: The UoB, Totalism, Oswald Mosley (now leader of the TUC), The Third Internationale (Commune of France, Uob, Iberian Federation), Dislikes: Savinkov and his Russian State (animals all of them), The Third International (I could do better), Fascism (simply because it's Italian), Italians, Brazilians! His Son Jet, his dead wife Chandrice, His dead mom, his dead dad, Liberals (fags), nation populists (larp), Monarchies (Cringe), Femboys (would still clap)! The Reichspakt (German Empire and its puppets) and the Entente! Archetype: Egomaniac, Eccentric Professor, Veteran Professor, le warcriminal. Appearance: Generic Professor Uniform (sublieutenant), circle glasses. Body: burly and muscular, Sexuality: Bisexual and homophobic (Hard times create soft men, and soft men make me hard) Weapons: still has an M1917 Enfield from his army days, and a revolver. Backstory: Born to a drunkard Irishman (Larry) and a flimsy Englishwoman (Bethovena), Little Samuel endured a spartan childhood. He slowly learned how to dodge the beer bottles hurled at him by his drunken father and scavenged in the trash because his mom could burn a boiled egg at how incompetent she was! By seven he was put into school by his mum and would be a pest to his teachers as he would always be a rebel (their belt proved harder to dodge). By 14 however, he would have to take a job at a newspaper company as the "Wheltkrieg" began and his Father's drunk ass would be conscripted into the army and sent to fight in France! By November 1916, he and his mum would receive the news that Larry was dead, something that didn't bother Sam in the slightest, but greatly upset his mom. Paranoic about how the "house ecosystem" changed, she would now insist on taking his role as the "alpha"...so basically she began hurling beer bottles as Sam too! One thing leads to another, and by 1917 mommy issues lead to mommy deaths! For killing his mom with a steel Pan, Sam would be arrested and sentenced to forced labor, and then Army after turning 18. In April 1918 he was conscripted to fight with the rest of his work camp buddies in the war and would participate in the British-Belgian offensive in Flanders, supporting the Tanks at Amiens. But will be greatly disappointed after being forced to "pussy out" at the Sixth Battle of Ypres as everyone retreated! In 1919, things like the "Irish War of Independence" and "Great German Offensive" along with the "Third Battle of the Somme" and the failure of "the Allied May Offensive" perplexed Sam, giving a more cynic view of the war, saying "It's like watching two geriatric old men fight for a pack of dickpills! It's sad, it's pathetic and neither of them gets hard!". On November 6th, 1919, the Treaty of Versailles would be signed and the war would finally be over! Arriving back home, Sam would find himself doing comedy skits for a meager gain until Meeting Nock Roshesynd, who would show Sam the ways of Syndicalism and even hook him up with his cousin, Chandrice, who in turn would bear him a son in 1920...Jet! When the British Revolution finally started in '24 and in 1925 would participate in a counter-rally held by none other than Oswal Mosley! And through the revolution, Mosley would name Samuel his "Top Guy" And be his closest confidant after the revolution, evening accompanying him on his trip across the world and assisting Mosley in what would later become Totalism/Maximism...or as Sam would Describe it "The New Cool"! In the 30s however, Sam would need a job! a nice job that would truly let him click with his new Totalist mindset, and in 1935 he would as Mosley vouched for him to be hired as Professor of politics at the Sir Dennis Academy, where he would quickly gain notoriety as the "eccentric one"! And yet, in 1936, right after his wife's death He would take a small "vacation" to Spain and by that, he joined the Volunteers in helping the Anarchists win Spain! Unfortunately, due to a failed attack on Carlist positions, Sam's buddy, George Orwell, died of bullet poisoning. This enraged Sam, who then proceeded to bite off his Spanish officer's testicles and sexually assault his twinkish second-in-command! this fiasco led to Sam returning back to the Academy in March 1937, right as another civil war started in America. Then also found out that his chubster of a son went to fucking China so he could help the left Kuomintang gf (Jo See) fight the Qing. -calls White people "Wigga" -calls Black people "Tobuscus" -calls Latino people "Latinx" -calls French people "Faggettes" -calls German people "Kaiserlings" -calls Indians and South Asians "yuck people" -calls racists "yikes people" despite being a closeted racist -calls Savinkov fans "savvy simps" -calls Amerindians "Hoya people"