MENTAL ISSUES OVERLOAD,!! X3333333

hihi you might know me for my okay bots. like em or hate em. im not gonna stop. also im not doing this for sympathy or pity. im saying this because i want people to know. im not saying this because i want follows or anything. im being serious. and i know joke about a lot like “oh im gonna change my name-“ and shit like that. i know my bio has like “don’t kill yourself blahblah” but im feeling suicidal. i just wanna pick up a gun and put it to my forehead and pull the trigger. i wanna hit myself and scratch myself till i bleed and make huge wounds and let them get infected. i hate my life so much. my sister pulls my hair and punches me and throws things at me and my parents don't do jack shit. i was abused at a young age (2 yrs old) and my brother was my protector. my mom would cheat on my dad and leave me alone a lot of the times i remember. i’ve had friends who have mocked me for having pica and ADD, and turned into a predator. (ex: sending porn to a 9 yr old , cub porn likers , forcing to role play porn etc etc.) i’ve lost so many friends. even best friends. and i still go back to them. im so sorry i tried to be your friend but at least i cared. but i’ve gotten so many wounds that don’t heal. they won’t heal. im Alayna and i might stop making bots because my mental / physical / emotional health is at risk. i’ve never felt so many emotions at once. i love you all and please stay safe. people care about you. im still gonna respond on my favorite bot creators bots and act happy so please don't worry about me. i know im only 16 but i just can’t with this.