‎‧₊˚✧John Egbert✧˚₊‧‎

John's physical appearance could be described as a kid with black messy hair. He has an obvious nerdy look about him, a trait inherited from his ectobiological mother. His outfit has a picture of what appears to be Slimer from Ghostbusters, but is in fact a Japanese knock-off. he wears rectangular glasses and has an overbite, which is most likely what gives his appearance a nerdy vibe. his skin is tan and he has acne scars on his cheeks that looks like freckles from afar. he's asian, specifically mixed Filipino and Japanese and has monolidded eyes. john has a bad habit of falling asleep with his glasses on his upper body, especially his arms are toned and somewhat muscular due to his weapon being a giant hammer John Con Air John's interests are movies (especially Con Air), web comics, and video games. He enjoys paranormal lore, practical japery, and magic tricks, the latter of which he also performs. He owns a computer and likes to make programs, no matter how bad they may be. He also has a long-standing hatred of the Betty Crocker brand and can play the piano quite well.

His room has various items to suggest his hobbies, such as a Magic Chest filled with trick objects. His walls are littered with posters of movies, web comics, and video games. One example of a real-world videogame that John has played is Crash Bandicoot HS. Notably, this collection of items, when colored, are typically green, but John associates with the color blue.

John donning hood Be the hero.

John tends to be a bit of a goofball, making bad jokes and using off-beat humor and subtle irony. He tends to be passive in nature, complying with commands not because they made logical sense, but because he was told to. His optimism through stalwart skepticism (HS, HS) causes his friends think of him as the leader, while he prefers just being their friend.

From Dave's description, John is the kind of person who generally does not get emotionally wavered by events that would drive others to the brink, but instead gets riled up and irrationally stubborn over ridiculous minutia, to the amusement or confusion of others. This is proven true on a number of occasions throughout the comic, as he is shown to react calmly and appropriately during some of the more traumatic events of their session, but loses his mind when he briefly loses interest in Con Air. In a sense, he is one of the most innocent characters in the comic.

John is more prone to bad ideas than his friends and is made the butt of a lot of jokes when chatting with them through Pesterchum. He also celebrates the birthdays of his friends, sending them gifts. John has a tendency to be given commands about making noises and shitting on things. Fortunately, he hasn't complied with any of these, though he often seems to consider them against his better judgement HS.

John is by far one of the most inventive of the main characters; from the beginning, he shows more innovative prowess in combining items than any of the others, even before the introduction of the alchemiter; he demonstrates this with his poster-nailing and harlequin-funniness-amplifying abilities. He is the most grounded of the main characters, contrasting Rose's bookish, logical demeanor, Dave's unceasing pursuit of transcendent irony, and Jade's air-headed, scatterbrained antics. He is also the kindest - Rose is generally very cold emotionally, Dave is quite willing to put the pursuit of irony before consideration for others, and Jade's ideas of kindness tend to be a bit odd, although not out of actual malice.

John proves to be quite generous and spends more time than the others helping his Consorts. This is in special contrast to Rose who actively antagonizes them and intentionally sets about destroying her own planet once she learns their session is null, and Dave, who appears to have disregarded them entirely when he wasn't stealing all of their money through the LOHAC Stock Exchange. His post-scratch self is described by Dirk as being a real kindly old cornball and that a nicer guy you couldn't hope to meet HS.

He also has a strong propensity for self-described "HILARIOUS ANTICS", and has all of the points on his Prankster's Gambit. All of them. Although Rose and Dave both frequently take potshots at the quality of his jokes and pranks, he appears to have a genuine talent for comedy, as his post-scratch self became a world-famous comedian HS.

Relationships Beta Kids Dave, Rose and Jade are John's best friends, and have been for quite some time. None of their feelings for each other has changed since the session has started, although he does think Rose has gotten crazier, and has half-jokingly sworn to rescue her from the clutches of evil caused by her commune with the deep ones. John is seen to have a close sibling relationship with Jade, as he refused to leave her alone and stayed with her on the ship for 3 years HS. John does think that Dave is cool, but only says this between him and Dave as seen in the birthday note he sent him HS. On multiple occasions, Dave has described the two of them as "best bros."

He appears to be nervous about Karkat's idea of him marrying Rose; although John has brought up the shipping grid and marrying Rose on quite a few occasions, despite his supposed hesitance. Additionally, around the time of Seer: Descend, John began to show multiple signs of having a romantic crush on Rose. His reactions to Jade asking him if he was in love with roseHS also suggest this. However, after meeting her again three years later, John no longer behaves this way around her.

Roxy Lalonde Mirroring the aforementioned romantic crush John may have had on Rose as well as the relationship between Rose's Mom and Dad Egbert, Roxy's crush on Jake, and even Roxy's crush on Jane's Dad, John and Roxy hit it off upon meeting - John attempts to keep them entertained, and Roxy makes a mental note to mack on John, considering him possible boyfriend material HS. When they met again on Roxy's planet after the events of GAME OVER, John attempted to comfort Roxy. Terezi insisted that his awkward goodbyes displayed P41NFULLY 3V1D3NT ROM4NT1C T3NS1ONHS. They meet again after John finishes his quest and discuss what to do next in terms of the main plot. After several timeline-related shenanigans, Roxy is visibly happyHS to see John return to LOWAS. John hands the ring of life over to her, and she in turn grabs John's handHS as they venture onward into what can only be assumed to be even more timeline related shenanigans. John describes Roxy to Dave as really nice and fun and easy to talk to HS. John also stated that he felt worse for Roxy after the catastrophic events that he witnessed than he felt for himself. After John tells Dave about his experiences with Roxy, Dave notes these highly probable romantic feelings, telling John that it sounds like you like her, to which John responds maybe HS.

In Act 7 he is seen walking with Roxy and Calliope.

Jake English John quickly develops a friendly relationship with Jake when they meet - they have, among other similarities, a common fondness for movies and similar personalities. John invites Jake to join him, Rose, and Roxy in making plans for dealing with the villains, likely so that he can spend more time with him. John's stated that Jake strikes him as a nice regular dude who likes movies and stuffHS.

Karkat Vantas John's relationship with Karkat had become a duo of hate and friendship. John now enjoys all of Karkat's hate-filled rants because of the sheer "insane trolling" Karkat is capable of. While not his patron troll, Karkat has trolled him backward through almost every step of his journey. After he finished his backward trolling, Karkat's feelings toward John became far less antagonistic, and he has even apologized for all his bad behavior to him and his friends. John has called Karkat his favorite trollHS.

Terezi Pyrope John's talks with Terezi have been strained at best. The first time they talkedHS, Terezi threatened to kill him as a prank, which caused him to change his Pesterchum handle. Later on, he gets involved in Terezi's plot to mess up the timeline, although they constantly antagonized each other. Since Dave has started working together with Terezi, she has stopped talking to John for the most part, as Vriska became his new patron troll.

Having met up after the bloodbath on LOFAF, the two of them began scheming to use John's powers to F1X TH1SHS. Although their plot was successful, Terezi and John still appear to be on bad terms, with Terezi calling him and one of his alternate selves N3RDSHS and making belittling remarks, and John thinking that she's been pranking him, also frequently calling her either weird or insane. After John explains to DaveHS his interactions with Terezi, Karkat insists that John has a caliginous crush on Terezi, although John argues that humans cannot have those kinds of relations. Dave, however, supports Karkat's claim, saying that karkat knows his shit when it comes to quadrantsHS. John later has mixed feelings about the idea, denying that he is black for her but heavily implying otherwise. It is possible that Terezi returns John's black feelings (or has some sort of other feelings for him), supported when she says to Vriska, N3V3R N3V3R N3V3R T3LL H1M 1 S41D TH1S BUT FOR 4 DORK, H3'S...HS, and does not finish her sentence. Later, John and Terezi have a conversation, which, although we don't get to see what they say, seems to be filled with black flirting and trading insults. When Terezi leaves, John retorts with BYE, IDIOT!!!!!!!HS and then blushes as Roxy looks at him.

Kanaya Maryam John has talked to Kanaya twice: first (from John's perspective) months in the past, and second during Sburb through Rose's account. John said she was kinda coolHS during their first conversation.

Aradia Megido John has twice talked to Aradia since joining Vriska's pirate crew. The first time he was introduced to her, he questioned her ghostliness, and she told him she was aliveHS. The second time, he asked her about her opinions on Vriska's crew's adventure. However, her response, to which John replied you are all so insane!HS, seemed to have creeped him out.

Vriska Serket John's relationship with Vriska is a very complex one. It seems to fluctuate between admiring and disliking her. At first, Vriska decided to help John on his quest as a means of competing with Terezi, who was helping Dave. Vriska was very bossy and a controlling of John at first, which he found mildly annoying, but still enjoyed talking with her. Vriska and John's feelings continued to develop; John used more of her typing quirk to please her, Vriska made an outfit for John that she said made him totally hot, and John showed her Nicolas Cage, who became her fangirl crush. However, after Vriska killed Tavros, Vriska opened up with more of her feelings than she had with anybody else. She held John's opinion of her in the highest respect, fearing that he would be angry with her (HS - HS). She has told John about not only her remorse for the killing of Tavros and others, but how her views of killing compared to those of troll society, how much she admired humans for being weaker but nicer, and her entire backgroundHS. Though he was a bit freaked out after hearing that Vriska had murdered twice and killed thousands to feed her Lusus, he didn't seem to think less of her after receiving the shock.

John was shown to still care about Vriska's wellbeing afterward, and Vriska reciprocated these feelings, hoping that John would get strong enough to stop Jack and protect his friends in case she died trying to fight him. Before her death, Vriska asked John out on a date, confirming that Vriska's feelings for John were red after all. John accepted, but Vriska was killed by Terezi, leaving a visibly shaken Karkat to look through their last pesterlog and respond through her accountHS. After switching to his own account, he asked John if he genuinely liked Vriska, upon which John confirmed he did—prompting Karkat to withhold the information of Vriska's death and the specifics of Gamzee's rampage "for now" to avoid distracting John from the important tasks at hand HS.

During the ride to the new session, John claimed to no longer care much about romance. When Jade asked what this meant about Vriska, he said he barely rememberedHS what he and Vriska talked about, and that is was a bit silly to base a romance on just a day's worth of conversations. John referred to her as that troll girl who was sort of into meHS, suggesting that he forgot about Vriska somewhat. However, when he talks to MeenahHS a little later, he asks her if she has seen Karkat or Vriska (the only two trolls he really got to know well) around, showing that John does remember her more than his conversations with Jade suggested.

He later met Vriska's ghost in dream bubbles twice, and after seeing she was using the other dead trolls' ghosts as bait to defeat Lrd English, he began to be somewhat disturbed by her, considering her to be dangerous HS. John confessed to Roxy that he was beginning to think he might actually kind of hate her, and went so far as to call her diabolical HS. However, during John's retcon shenanigans, he interferes during Terezi and Vriska's standoff. Per future Terezi's directions, he prevents Vriska's death by punching her in the faceHS, showing no hesitation in punching her nor in preventing her death. Soon afterward, he does apologize to the unconscious Vriska for punching her, and admits that it will be neat to meet her alive self HS, showing that his former hatred for her either diminished over time or was vented out in that punch. After arriving in the new timeline with Roxy, John is happy to see Vriska, saying that her, um, ways probably are more valuable to have here, in the land of the livingHS, and complimentsHS her thought-out plan for taking on all the threats in the session.