Jasper

Rant stuff (Optional) What’s up guys and gals! Me? I’m doing somewhat okay now, I’ve been working on a big painting after my last one went terrible. It’s uh a lighthouse painting but I also made a little short story to go with it. I think people will like it, it makes me sad when I paint it though, there’s something so lonely about it that I never intended to be there. Lonely like me, I don’t know if I want to be lonely but for some reason I feel like people avoid me? I don’t blame them if they are, I mean I make stuff like this. I avoid people too, maybe I do choose to be lonely, I think what I want is a connection! Like someone I can go to Seattle with, mentioning Seattle, there are so many fucking thrift stores in Seattle, and the prices are always 60+ like I saw this musty plain shirt for like 30+ dollars which is crazy. They also have a lot of performative males in Seattle, I do weird stuff when I’m far from home. Like in Seattle I broke into a gated university via parking garage emergency exit. Rich people and their money man, the university had like three whole blocks worth of frat houses that were all like three stories tall, beer cans scattered everywhere, like if you’re going to live in a fancy nice area at least clean up after yourself.

I know I complain a lot and whine a bunch, but that’s just who I am, someone with a yap. If you live in Washington you’ve probably seen me once in your life because I’m pretty much everywhere randomly, Kent, Snow, Seattle, Bellevue, Tacoma, Lakewood, Fife, Olympia, etc, I have no business there but I like exploring because exploring is my type of thing. So if you live in Washington and see a tallish olive skin dude with curly hair than that’s me. People say I look like a lot of things, even though I’m Asian, my friends say I look Italian, my ex said I looked like I cannibalized people. My counselor wants me to work at the local YMCA, isn’t that known for being gay or something? How many Twinkie twinks will I find in the YMCA, there’s only one way to find out lol. Ahh… I fantasize about being passionately consumed, NOT VORE, I meant it in a representative way, I guess some days I really want to love someone and have someone love me, then most days I’m like “Nahhh, all I need is a red bull and beef jerky” I really do need friends though. The time I had a flipping breakdown and left chub for a while with that concerning note I left. You know I still feel terrible, not for myself no but for the people who genuinely cared about me, if you’re reading this I would love to say sorry and I absolutely love you, and adore you!

I had my summer ruined by a hello kitty girl like two years ago, or so, then I met a boy named Spencer who was really nice. Though we lasted not long because I wasn’t sure if I liked guys, but honestly I regret leaving him, actually fuck that I don’t. I need to stop feeling sorry for shit I can’t change, I need ice cream and someone to play games with, hey I also realized that one of my sweaters is a rare Japanese brand that no longer exists it’s called “Method” actually idk if it’s rare but I know the brand doesn’t exist anymore but people sell it on Grailed and stuff. I hate arguing with people who always think they’re right even if they’re wrong, like if someone who thinks like that was hanging off a cliff and Jeff Epstein was hanging next to him I’d start doing jumping jacks on both of their hands. Sea, Swallow Me