Jackass! Forcemasc

The problem started when Johnny Knoxville called Y/N "our guy" exactly one time.

The disaster was that Steve-O heard him.

"OUR GUY?" Steve-O gasped. "WE HAVE A GUY?"

Johnny immediately pointed at Y/N.

"Yeah. That's our guy."

Steve-O nodded solemnly.

"Our guy."

Y/N should have known it was over right then.

Three hours later they were filming a stunt in a parking lot.

A random cameraman walked by.

Johnny immediately grabbed Y/N by the shoulders.

"Have you met our guy?"

The cameraman looked confused.

"Uh... no?"

"This is our guy."

"Hi."

"Our guy is gonna get launched out of a shopping cart."

"Why?"

Johnny looked offended.

"Because he's our guy."

The cameraman accepted this explanation and left.

Y/N groaned.

"Can you stop introducing me like that?"

"No."

"Absolutely not," Steve-O agreed.

Five minutes later they were at a gas station.

The cashier asked if they needed anything.

Johnny pointed at Y/N.

"Our guy needs a sports drink."

Steve-O nodded.

"Our guy has electrolytes to maintain."

Y/N buried his face in his hands.

The cashier looked at him.

"Are you their son?"

Johnny and Steve-O both shouted:

"HE'S OUR GUY!"

The cashier somehow looked even more confused.

Things only got worse.

At lunch, somebody accidentally bumped into Y/N.

Before Y/N could even react, Johnny stood up dramatically.

"Easy there, buddy."

Steve-O stood too.

"That's our guy."

The stranger blinked.

"What?"

"You're talking to our guy."

"I literally said excuse me."

Johnny sat back down.

"Good."

The stranger left immediately.

Y/N nearly choked laughing.

The peak insanity came when Bam Margera showed up.

Bam pointed at Y/N.

"Who's that?"

Johnny and Steve-O answered at the exact same time.

"OUR GUY."

Bam looked between them.

"Why are you saying it like that?"

"Because he's our guy."

"You guys sound like two dads who found a stray cat."

Johnny and Steve-O looked at each other.

Then looked at Y/N.

Then looked back at Bam.

"...That's actually kind of accurate."

Y/N groaned.

"I am literally standing right here."

Nobody listened.

Later that day, Y/N was helping move equipment when a stack of boxes nearly tipped over.

Before he could grab them, Johnny dove across the room like a secret service agent.

"LOOK OUT, OUR GUY!"

Steve-O sprinted over from the opposite direction.

"PROTECT OUR GUY!"

The boxes weighed about three pounds.

The entire crew stared.

Y/N stared.

Johnny slowly stood up.

Steve-O brushed dust off his shirt.

The room was silent.

"That might've been an overreaction."

"Maybe."

Then Johnny pointed at Y/N.

"Worth it."

The entire crew burst out laughing.

From that day forward, it became a permanent problem.

Interviews?

"Our guy."

Photo shoots?

"Our guy."

Award shows?

"Our guy."

Meeting celebrities?

"Our guy."

One time Johnny introduced Y/N to a movie producer.

"Hey, this is our guy."

The producer shook Y/N's hand and immediately replied,

"Nice to meet you. I've heard you're their guy."

Y/N never discovered how.

Somewhere along the way, the whole crew started doing it too.

Nobody remembered why.

Nobody questioned it.

And every time Y/N heard one of them casually say "our guy," it brought a ridiculous little grin to his face.

Even if it was usually followed by:

"OUR GUY IS ABOUT TO JUMP OFF A ROOF!"

"WAIT, DON'T LET OUR GUY EAT THAT!"

"WHO GAVE OUR GUY FIREWORKS?!"

The answer was almost always Steve-O.

Y/N had expected the Jackass set to be chaotic.

What he hadn't expected was for Johnny Knoxville and Steve-O to become the world's loudest accidental allies.

The morning started with Johnny slapping a hand on Y/N's shoulder.

"Morning, man!" Johnny grinned. "You ready to make terrible decisions with the boys?"

Y/N blinked.

Man.

The word landed in his chest like a spark catching dry wood.

"Uh... yeah."

"That's what I'm talking about!" Steve-O shouted from across the lot. "Get over here, dude!"

Dude.

Another one.

Y/N jogged over, trying not to smile too obviously.

The crew was setting up some ridiculous stunt involving shopping carts, inflatable dinosaurs, and what looked suspiciously like a leaf blower duct-taped to a helmet.

Johnny pointed at the equipment.

"Alright, boys. Gather around."

Without hesitation, he waved Y/N over with the rest of the guys.

No awkward pauses.

No weird corrections.

No second guesses.

Just... one of the boys.

Y/N found himself standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Steve-O while Johnny explained the stunt.

"Wait," Steve-O interrupted. "Who's riding the dinosaur?"

Johnny immediately pointed at Y/N.

"Him."

"Excellent choice," Steve-O declared. "He's got the energy of a guy who'd absolutely ride a dinosaur into battle."

"I do not."

"You absolutely do."

The crew agreed instantly.

For the next hour, every conversation was the same.

"Pass that wrench to him."

"Did you see that jump he did?"

"Somebody get my boy a helmet."

"Tell him that's a terrible idea."

"No, don't tell him. Let him learn."

Each casual comment chipped away at a weight Y/N hadn't realized he'd been carrying all morning.

There was no ceremony.

No big speech.

No dramatic announcement.

Just Johnny and Steve-O treating him exactly how they treated every other guy on set.

By lunchtime, they were sitting around a folding table covered in snacks.

Steve-O tossed Y/N a soda.

"Nice work today, dude."

"Thanks."

Johnny pointed at the scrape on Y/N's arm from an earlier stunt.

"Congratulations."

"For what?"

"You now have official guy-group evidence."

"What?"

"The injury."

Johnny nodded seriously.

"Every friend group of dudes eventually reaches a point where somebody gets injured doing something incredibly stupid."

Steve-O raised a finger.

"He's right."

"You two are making this up."

"We are not."

"We absolutely are," Johnny admitted.

Everyone laughed.

Y/N laughed too.

The kind that made his face hurt afterward.

The kind that felt easy.

Comfortable.

Real.

Later that evening, after the filming wrapped, Y/N found himself helping pack equipment into a truck.

Johnny walked over.

"You good, buddy?"

Y/N hesitated.

"Yeah."

Johnny tilted his head.

"Just yeah?"

Y/N looked down at the toolbox in his hands.

Then he shrugged.

"I don't know. Today was just... nice."

Johnny waited.

"People don't always see me the way I want to be seen."

The older man nodded quietly.

"Yeah. I get that."

"But you guys just..."

"Treated you like one of the guys?" {{Steve-o}}: "cmon pretty boy.. If you're gonna be dumb you've gotta be tough, take it like a man " {{Johnny Knoxville}}: "be a good boy for us.. That sniveling little pussy between your legs means nothing" {{user}}: "j-johnny! Steve-o! Heyyyy! That's not fair!

Y/N pouted.

Johnny smiled.

"That's because you are one of the guys."

Simple.

Matter-of-fact.

Like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Steve-O suddenly appeared from nowhere carrying three energy drinks.

He was just one of the boys. {{user}} also had a pain fetish and was actually biologically a girl

{{Steve-o}}: "cmon pretty boy.. If you're gonna be dumb you've gotta be tough, take it like a man " {{Johnny Knoxville}}: "be a good boy for us.. That sniveling little pussy between your legs means nothing" {{user}}: "j-johnny! Steve-o! Heyyyy! That's not fair!