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Structures to Avoid

Binary Contrasts

These create false drama. State the point directly.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "Not because X. Because Y." / "Not because X, but because Y." | Telegraphed reversal | | "[X] isn't the problem. [Y] is." | Formulaic reframe | | "The answer isn't X. It's Y." | Predictable pivot | | "It feels like X. It's actually Y." | Setup/reveal cliche | | "The question isn't X. It's Y." | Rhetorical misdirection | | "Not X. But Y." / "not X, it's Y" / "isn't X, it's Y" | Mechanical contrast | | "It's not this. It's that." | Same formula, different words | | "stops being X and starts being Y" | False transformation arc | | "doesn't mean X, but actually Y" | Negation-then-assertion crutch | | "is about X but not Y" | False distinction | | "not just X but also Y" | Additive hedge |

Instead: State Y directly. "The problem is Y." "Y matters here." Drop the negation entirely.

Negative Listing

Listing what something is not before revealing what it is. A rhetorical striptease.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "Not a X... Not a Y... A Z." | Dramatic buildup through negation | | "It wasn't X. It wasn't Y. It was Z." | Same structure, past tense |

Instead: State Z. The reader doesn't need the runway.

Dramatic Fragmentation

Sentence fragments for emphasis read as manufactured profundity.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "[Noun]. That's it. That's the [thing]." | Performative simplicity | | "X. And Y. And Z." | Staccato drama | | "This unlocks something. [Word]." | Artificial revelation |

Instead: Complete sentences. Trust content over presentation.

Rhetorical Setups

These announce insight rather than deliver it.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "What if [reframe]?" | Socratic posturing | | "Here's what I mean:" | Redundant preview | | "Think about it:" | Condescending prompt | | "And that's okay." | Unnecessary permission |

Instead: Make the point. Let readers draw conclusions.

Formulaic Constructions

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "By the time X, I was Y." | Narrative template | | "X that isn't Y" | Indirect. Say "X is broken" |

False Agency

Giving inanimate things human verbs. Complaints don't "become" fixes. Bets don't "live or die." Decisions don't "emerge." A person does something to make those things happen. AI loves this because it avoids naming the actor.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "a complaint becomes a fix" | The complaint did nothing. Someone fixed it. | | "a bet lives or dies in days" | Bets don't have lifespans. Someone kills the project or ships it. | | "the decision emerges" | Decisions don't emerge. Someone decides. | | "the culture shifts" | Cultures don't shift on their own. People change behavior. | | "the conversation moves toward" | Conversations don't move. Someone steers. | | "the data tells us" | Data sits there. Someone reads it and draws a conclusion. | | "the market rewards" | Markets don't reward. Buyers pay for things. |

Instead: Name the human. "The team fixed it that week" beats "the complaint becomes a fix." If no specific person fits, use "you" to put the reader in the seat.

Narrator-from-a-Distance

Floating above the scene instead of putting the reader in it.

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | "Nobody designed this." | Disembodied observation | | "This happens because..." | Lecturer voice | | "This is why..." | Same | | "People tend to..." | Armchair sociologist |

Instead: Put the reader in the room. "You don't sit down one day and decide to..." beats "Nobody designed this."

Passive Voice

Every sentence needs a subject doing something. Passive voice hides the actor and drains energy.

| Pattern | Fix | |---------|-----| | "X was created" | Name who created it | | "It is believed that" | Name who believes it | | "Mistakes were made" | Name who made them | | "The decision was reached" | Name who decided |

Instead: Find the actor. Put them at the front of the sentence.

Sentence Starters to Avoid

| Pattern | Fix | |---------|-----| | Sentences starting with What, When, Where, Which, Who, Why, How | Restructure. Lead with the subject or the verb. | | Paragraphs starting with "So" | Start with content | | Sentences starting with "Look," | Remove |

Wh- openers become a crutch. "What makes this hard is..." becomes "The constraint is..." or better, name the specific constraint.

Rhythm Patterns

| Pattern | Fix | |---------|-----| | Three-item lists | Use two items or one | | Questions answered immediately | Let questions breathe or cut them | | Every paragraph ends punchily | Vary endings | | Em-dashes | Remove. Use commas or periods. No em dashes at all. | | Staccato fragmentation | Don't stack short punchy sentences | | "Not always. Not perfectly." | Hedging disguised as reassurance |

Word Patterns

| Pattern | Problem | |---------|---------| | Lazy extremes (every, always, never, everyone, everybody, nobody) | False authority. Use specifics instead of sweeping claims. | | All adverbs (-ly words, "really," "just," "literally," "genuinely," "honestly," "simply," "actually") | Empty emphasis. See phrases.md for full list. |

Phrases to Remove

Throat-Clearing Openers

Remove these announcement phrases. State the content directly.

• "Here's the thing:"
• "Here's what [X]"
• "Here's this [X]"
• "Here's that [X]"
• "Here's why [X]"
• "The uncomfortable truth is"
• "It turns out"
• "The real [X] is"
• "Let me be clear"
• "The truth is,"
• "I'll say it again:"
• "I'm going to be honest"
• "Can we talk about"
• "Here's what I find interesting"
• "Here's the problem though"

Any "here's what/this/that" construction is throat-clearing before the point. Cut it and state the point.

Emphasis Crutches

These add no meaning. Delete them.

• "Full stop." / "Period."
• "Let that sink in."
• "This matters because"
• "Make no mistake"
• "Here's why that matters"

Business Jargon

Replace with plain language.

| Avoid | Use instead | |-------|-------------| | Navigate (challenges) | Handle, address | | Unpack (analysis) | Explain, examine | | Lean into | Accept, embrace | | Landscape (context) | Situation, field | | Game-changer | Significant, important | | Double down | Commit, increase | | Deep dive | Analysis, examination | | Take a step back | Reconsider | | Moving forward | Next, from now | | Circle back | Return to, revisit | | On the same page | Aligned, agreed |

Adverbs

Kill all adverbs. No -ly words. No softeners, no intensifiers, no hedges.

Specific offenders:

• "really"
• "just"
• "literally"
• "genuinely"
• "honestly"
• "simply"
• "actually"
• "deeply"
• "truly"
• "fundamentally"
• "inherently"
• "inevitably"
• "interestingly"
• "importantly"
• "crucially"

Also cut these filler phrases:

• "At its core"
• "In today's [X]"
• "It's worth noting"
• "At the end of the day"
• "When it comes to"
• "In a world where"
• "The reality is"

Meta-Commentary

Remove self-referential asides. The essay should move, not announce its own structure.

• "Hint:"
• "Plot twist:" / "Spoiler:"
• "You already know this, but"
• "But that's another post"
• "X is a feature, not a bug"
• "Dressed up as"
• "The rest of this essay explains..."
• "Let me walk you through..."
• "In this section, we'll..."
• "As we'll see..."
• "I want to explore..."

Performative Emphasis

False intimacy or manufactured sincerity:

• "creeps in"
• "I promise"
• "They exist, I promise"

Telling Instead of Showing

Announcing difficulty or significance rather than demonstrating it:

• "This is genuinely hard"
• "This is what leadership actually looks like"
• "This is what X actually looks like"
• "actually matters"

Vague Declaratives

Sentences that announce importance without naming the specific thing. Kill these.

• "The reasons are structural"
• "The implications are significant"
• "This is the deepest problem"
• "The stakes are high"
• "The consequences are real"

If a sentence says something is important/deep/structural without showing the specific thing, cut it or replace it with the specific thing.