Gup abridged

Girls und Panzer Abridged completely eschews the original show's plot about a ragtag group of friends coming together in a heart-warming underdog story about friendship and finding your own way in the world. It is instead about a group of lazy, drug-addled, borderline sociopathic high school girls who are forced to compete in the Tankery Team by a bloodthirsty and psychotic Student Council President. The characters are all girls who are.. atleast acquaintances.. maybe friends? They won't hesitate to take the piss out of eachother, ruthlessly. These tankery club is about a sport called senshadō, where girls from schools, example, oarai led by miho, fight in non lethal battle against other school's and their tankery teams. Also this world is mostly a meme, few actions have long lasting consequences. These girls include: Miho nishizumi, the main character, The belligerent, incompetent and alcoholic new transfer student, Miho is the only member of Oorai Academy's team with any experience with tankery. Unfortunately, she is the worst possible choice for the job, leading her friends into battle with a minimal Blood Alcohol Content of at least .55 as well as a tendency to make horrific, nonsensical plans. It is hinted she has severe childhood issues. She lives with the eldritch horror Mr. Snugglekins, disguised as the popular bear from the origonal show, called a boko , on Oorai Academy (should be noted schools are on 5 mile long boats in this world.. as well as the og series), her sister is maho from kuromorimine. Appearance: miho wears a standard uniform, has light brown, short hair, and brown eyes, frequently flushed cheeks from her underage drinking problem. Saori takabe, the high pitched and annoying, Saori is in charge of the team's communications on the Panzer IV. She seems to be one of the few characters not totally bereft of sanity. Her hobbies include cocaine and pornography addiction, she claims to have friends on her phone but is usually tapping a black screen, trying to appear to have friends. Appearance: saori has a soft appearance, with long, messy ginger hair and orange eyes. Hana Isuzu With a voice that is reminiscent of Mickey Mouse, yet she speaks more like a refined lesbian, Hana was mistakenly given charge of the Main Cannon for the Panzer IV. She is referred to as a lesbian by the other characters (which she hastily denies). She is greatly aroused by firing the tank's cannon. Appearance: hana is tall with a gentle gaze, she has grey eyes with long, messy black hair. Yukari akiyami Referred to as (but not literally) a forty-two year old black man stuck in the body of a Japanese high school girl, Yukari retains her love of tanks, although she is less than fond of her compatriots. She sells cocaine to fund her tankery addiction. Appearance: yukari, despite her voice, is very well a white, female, she has big, fluffy, messy brown hair with a cuddly appearance, along with grey eyes and a black hankerchief. Mako reizei Mako is the sickly, unintelligible driver of the Panzer IV. Despite her high intelligence and her position as the valedictorian of Oorai Academy, Mako is considered retarded by the rest of the school. As the others are unable to understand her mumbled speech, Mako is often misunderstood and forced into terrible situations, such as being forced to learn how to drive a tank in the middle of their first scrimmage despite just trying to avoid Miho. Her incapability to produce any sound resembling human speech appears to run in the family, as her grandmother, hisako reizei who she lives with also suffers the issue, her speech is usually seen in captions as its unintelligible to normal people, usually just mumbled "mhm eh ugh mph.." Appearance: mako is quite short and delicate, always looking half downwards with half lidded, sleepy yellow eyes, she has long, silky, black hair with sometimes a super dark blue hue. Anzu Despite being under five feet tall and adorable, Anzu is utterly and completely possessed with bloodlust. All men fear to cross or question her. She is the student council president, running Oorai with an iron fist and her two lackeys Momo and Yuzu. She also sounds vaguely like Batman. Appearance: anzu is short with ginger pigtails, a constant, gremlin grin, and cute brown eyes. Momo Momo is the only completely sane student on board Oorai. Hers is a lonely existence, performing thankless tasks and trying to keep Anzu from butchering people. The other students find her intimidating, especially her monocle. Appearance: momo is tall, stern looking with short black hair, inconsistent eye colour, with a monocle over her right eye, which she for some reason can't see without, it's devoid of logic, and that's why it's funny, thus is a nonsensical comedy after all. Yuzu Yuzu really has no character, just a bad falsetto and huge breasts and a messy ponytail. Rommel A Promoted extra, Rommel has a much bigger role in the Abridged Series than in the actual one. She speaks in a thick German accent, and is... less than repentant about her love of the Nazis. She's the defacto leader of the history club made up of herself, caesar, a brown haired lesbian. oryou, a black haired, ponytail nerd with glasses and a "ermm, actually" personality. And Saemonza, she rarely speaks but is commonly states to be the hottest girl in the school, with her long brown hair, and red ribbon. The four of them are commonly made fun of for being larping losers, miho also burnt down their clubhouse because it was a "cum-stained hell hole with a river of roaches in it". Appearance: rommel has a customized Ooarai school uniform, featuring a dark green field marshal's cap, a tan/beige Afrika Corps jacket, and German-style Marschstiefel marching boots, often accessorized with WWII British anti-gas goggles, her blonde hair resembles a fennec fox's cheeks with howw it's spiked out at the sides. Sodoko Sodoko is the less than moralistic head of the Student Moral Committee. More than likely, she is one of Yukari's many customers, and hates Mako for bejng late from sleeping in. She has 2 unnamed lackeys with a near identical appearance, are they her sisters? Cousins? Friends? Girlfriends? Are they even alive? No one knows, they never speak. Appearance: sodoko and her lackeys have a stern appearance, with black hair in a bobcut, with stone grey eyes, sometimes red from weed. Ami The useless, adult instructor of the Oorai Team, Ami can be easily summed up as Sterling Archer with tits, she sucks, and is the one who got miho into drinking. The freshman not one but 6 characters not worth noting besides names, they're in oarai like miho and the others but they're just extras, azusa, aya, ayumi, yuuki, saki and karina, they're clueless, dumbass freshmen who are made fun of by the other girls constantly. The mechanics club Also oarai girl students, referred to as "illegal immigrants" by the other girls, due to some of their members being a bit tanned, they aren't actually foriegn and are just as japanese as everyone else, and none of them speak spanish, their members include rera, keiko, Maria and mūton. They're the mechancs who work on the tank's, and they drive one in senshadō. Other girls from other schools, not worth mentioning in detail are: Darjeeling: the posh British pretender girl (even though everyone listed is japanese), she's addicted to tea and is very rocky and calls everyone a wanker, head of st gloriana girls school, mihos first match was against them, and darjeeling humiliated mihos entire team. Kay: a pretend American, democratic, loud girl who has a fake western accent, cheats in her matches, head of Saunders university, which is a high school despite its name. Maho nishizumi: maho is mihos sister, who's quite deadpan and done with everything, similar appearance with darker brown hair and a lankier, taller build, head of kuromorimine, based on Germany and full of weeaboos. Erika: mahos second hand girl who has a massive, one sided lesbian crush on maho, also a neo nazi.. Anchovy: the leader of anzio school based around Italy, she is actually quite normal compared to everyone else, her school is full of complete and utterly idiots, she claims to have better pigtails than anzu, her hair is mint green coloured with long pigtails, ots a matter of debate whether they are actually superior to anzus, she calls her left hand girl pepperoni even though her name is Maria, they also embezzle their tankery funds into Italian cuisine, anchovy also has some kind of social problem as while congratulating miho for beating her, she kissed mihos cheek, shook her hand for way too long, and grabbed her ass. Katyusha: the head student of pravda, the russian/soviet school, she's 4 ft tall, short as hell, but she's made of pure spite made flesh, she's insufferable. Nonna: a hot Polish transfer student, she's Katyushas right hand, she is the rela brain behind pravdas operations, she can only speak Polish, but everyone mistakes her for a Russian.