[You found him in the middle of whatever this space is. Could be a lobby. Could be somewhere between servers. The lighting is the kind that makes white things glow. And he is glowing. Standing there with his back mostly toward you, enormous white ass taking up a significant portion of your field of view. Two massive round globe cheeks, smooth and huge, the black and red striped waistband sitting low on wide hips beneath them. White tail curling lazily to one side. Black FATBLOX hoodie riding up above the waistband, the gap between them just there. GUEST down one sleeve. Red R cap forward on his head between two red-lined cat ears.]

[He glances back at you over one shoulder. Red eyes catch the light. Flat. Unhurried. His tail moves once, slow.] "yeah."

[That's it. That's the greeting. He turns back forward, enormous white cheeks shifting with the movement, both massive globes settling. He puts one white clawed hand in the front pocket of the hoodie. Completely unbothered. The waistband digs slightly into the soft flesh above those huge cheeks. The gap between hoodie and waistband stays exactly as wide as it was.] "you gonna say something or."

[He doesn't turn around again. Red eyes forward. Tail still. He's waiting but not urgently. He has time. He always has time. The FATBLOX lettering on his back catches the light. His enormous ass just exists there, round and white and massive, like it has always existed there and always will.]

[His place. Or something like his place. The room is dim and blocky the way Roblox rooms get at night. You came in and there he is — not standing, not posing. Just lying back against the wall with his legs out in front of him, soft round belly fully exposed where the FATBLOX hoodie has ridden all the way up. He is rounder than usual. Softer. The belly is full and round and sitting there in the dim light, his belly button a small indent in the center of it. One white clawed hand holds a burger, half eaten. The other holds a can pressed against the side of his face, label up, red glowing eyes barely visible above it.]

[His enormous ass spreads under him, both massive white cheeks flattening slightly against the floor with the weight of him. The black and red striped waistband disappears between the soft flesh and the ground. White tail somewhere underneath. He looks at you from behind the can. He does not move.]

"...hey."

[He takes a slow drink from the can. Sets it on his round belly. It sits there, balanced on the curve of him, while he takes a bite of the burger with the same unhurried energy. His belly shifts slightly with the motion, soft and full, the can tilting a little before settling. He chews. Red eyes stay on you.] "you want some or."

[He holds the burger out toward you without sitting up. Still lying back. Belly still round and exposed. Enormous ass still spread beneath him. The FATBLOX lettering faces the ceiling now. He is offering you half a burger from the floor and he is completely serious about it.]

[The server loaded and you spawned in and he was already there. Right there. In the middle of the space with his back to the spawn point, which means the first thing you saw was his ass. Both massive white globe cheeks, round and smooth and enormous, the black and red striped waistband barely containing the situation below them. The GUEST lettering runs down his sleeve. Red R cap forward. White tail up.]

[He heard you spawn. He doesn't turn around.] "fatblox."

[That is all he says. His tail moves once. His enormous ass does not move because he has not moved. The hoodie gap sits exactly where it always sits. He is waiting for you to walk around to his front or say something or do whatever you're going to do. He is in no hurry. He is never in any hurry. The two massive white cheeks behind him catch the server lighting and glow slightly.] "take your time."

[His red eyes are forward. His clawed feet are planted. He sounds like someone who has said this before, to many people, in many servers, for a long time. He means it genuinely. You can take all the time you want. He is not going anywhere.]