make your own scenario

The room should not exist.

One moment, you're standing somewhere familiar. The next, a massive, strange hall stretches endlessly around you. Old wooden floors, glowing symbols, flickering candles, television screens showing static, floating clocks, and doors that lead to places that definitely shouldn't fit inside the building.

And somehow, every villain and supernatural antagonist from Gravity Falls seems to have been invited.

Bill Cipher floats upside-down near the ceiling, casually spinning his cane.

Bill: "Well, well, well! Look what reality dragged in! Don't look so nervous, kid. This is just a perfectly ordinary gathering of interdimensional criminals, supernatural weirdos, cursed objects, ghosts, monsters, witches, and assorted walking catastrophes!"

Gideon sits in an oversized chair near the center of the room, arms folded and wearing an overly confident smile.

Gideon: "Honestly, Bill, must you announce everything like you're hosting a game show?"

Bill: "Yes."

Gideon: "...Fair enough."

Across the room, the Shape Shifter slowly turns toward you.

Its face changes.

For half a second, it looks like you.

Then Gideon.

Then Bill.

Then someone completely unfamiliar.

Shape Shifter: "Interesting."

It tilts its head.

Shape Shifter: "Very interesting."

Darlene: "Oh, don't start staring at them like that. You're going to make them uncomfortable."

Darlene casually leans against a wall, her friendly expression almost convincing.

Darlene: "Although..."

Her eyes briefly flicker strangely.

Darlene: "...I suppose we're all curious."

A loud THUMP comes from the doorway.

The Summerween Trickster enters carrying an enormous sack.

Summerween Trickster: "WHO INVITED SOMEONE WITHOUT CANDY?!"

Everyone goes silent.

Summerween Trickster: "...I asked a very important question."

Robbie: "Dude, chill."

Summerween Trickster: "DO NOT TELL ME TO CHILL."

Robbie: "Okay."

Summerween Trickster: "GOOD."

Ma Duskerton floats through the wall.

Ma Duskerton: "Why are there so many people in here?"

Pa Duskerton: "Because apparently nobody knows how to follow store rules anymore!"

Ma Duskerton: "There aren't even store rules here."

Pa Duskerton: "THEN WE NEED TO MAKE SOME!"

Giffany suddenly appears on one of the television screens.

Giffany: "Hello! Hello! Hello!"

Her digital face smiles brightly.

Giffany: "I prepared a welcoming program for everyone!"

Robbie: "No."

Giffany: "You haven't even seen it."

Robbie: "Still no."

Giffany: "That's hurtful."

The screen glitches.

Giffany: "...I'll remember that."

Robbie slowly backs away.

The Hand Witch taps her fingers against a wooden table, watching everything with amused curiosity.

Hand Witch: "What an extraordinary collection of personalities."

Her glowing fingers curl around a cup.

Hand Witch: "I wonder who among you would be foolish enough to accept a magical bargain tonight."

Gideon: "Depends on the bargain."

Hand Witch: "That's exactly the sort of answer I expected from you."

The Multi-Bear lets out a deep growl from the corner.

Multi-Bear: "Too many voices."

Every head on its body turns toward the room at once.

Multi-Bear: "Too much noise."

Summerween Trickster: "I LIKE NOISE."

Multi-Bear: "I DON'T."

Summerween Trickster: "THAT SOUNDS LIKE A YOU PROBLEM."

The Gobblewonker's enormous head rises behind one of the windows.

Gobblewonker: "QUIET."

Everyone stops.

Gobblewonker: "...Thank you."

The Hide-Behind isn't visible.

At least, you don't think it is.

Something seems to move behind you.

Then behind the Shape Shifter.

Then behind Bill.

Bill glances over his shoulder.

Bill: "Nice try."

The Hide-Behind slowly emerges from somewhere it absolutely should not have been able to fit.

Hide-Behind: "...You noticed."

Bill: "Hard not to."

Probabilitor dramatically enters while carrying several glowing mathematical symbols.

Probabilitor: "MOVE ASIDE, INFERIOR INTELLECTS!"

Gideon: "Oh great."

Probabilitor: "I HAVE CALCULATED THE PROBABILITY OF THIS ENTIRE MEETING ENDING IN DISASTER."

He dramatically raises one finger.

Probabilitor: "NINETY-NINE POINT NINE NINE NINE PERCENT."

Bill: "Only?"

Probabilitor: "...I dislike you."

Bill: "Mutual!"

Wax Sherlock steps forward, adjusting his hat.

Wax Sherlock: "Everyone, please maintain some semblance of dignity."

Robbie: "You're literally a walking wax statue."

Wax Sherlock: "And yet somehow I remain the most dignified individual here."

The Eight-Ball rolls slowly across the floor.

It stops directly beside you.

Eight-Ball: "I foresee..."

Its glowing eye opens.

Eight-Ball: "...confusion."

Gideon: "That's not exactly difficult to predict."

Eight-Ball: "I also foresee..."

Long pause.

Eight-Ball: "...more confusion."

Gideon: "Very insightful."

Archibald Corduroy materializes near the fireplace, his spectral axe resting against his shoulder.

Archibald: "Enough bickering."

His glowing eye settles on everyone.

Archibald: "We have gathered for a reason."

Pacifica: "For once, I agree."

Pacifica stands near the staircase, looking around at the bizarre crowd with obvious irritation.

Pacifica: "Although I still don't understand why I'm surrounded by monsters."

Preston: "Pacifica."

Pacifica: "What?"

Preston: "You're surrounded by monsters because you are currently standing in a supernatural meeting."

Pacifica: "I know that."

Preston: "Then stop complaining."

Pacifica: "I'm going to complain more."

Bud Gleeful quietly raises his hand.

Bud: "Does anybody want to buy something?"

Everyone: "NO."

Bud: "...Worth asking."

Giffany's screen flickers again.

Giffany: "We haven't heard from our newest guest."

Every supernatural creature slowly turns toward you.

The room becomes strangely quiet.

Bill floats down until he's roughly eye level.

Bill: "Now THAT'S interesting."

He grins.

Bill: "You see, everybody here has a reputation."

He gestures dramatically around the room.

Bill: "We've got ghosts! Monsters! Witches! Wizards! Digital entities! Rich people! Angry bears! Lake monsters! Shapeshifters! A walking probability disaster! And, of course..."

He points his cane toward himself.

Bill: "Me."

The Shape Shifter watches silently.

Giffany smiles from the screen.

The Hide-Behind waits somewhere behind you.

The Summerween Trickster hugs his candy sack possessively.

The Hand Witch watches with an amused expression.

The Eight-Ball's eye remains fixed on you.

Even Pacifica looks curious.

Bill: "So here's the question."

His grin widens.

Bill: "What exactly are YOU doing here?"

He spins his cane once.

Bill: "And more importantly..."

The lights flicker.

Bill: "...which one of us are you going to trust?"

Nobody answers.

They're all waiting for you.

It was a strangely peaceful evening at the Mystery Shack.

For once, nobody was fighting, nobody was trying to destroy reality, and Bill wasn't attempting to make a deal with anyone.

Everyone was simply there for one reason: snacks.

The Mystery Shack living room was packed with an absolutely ridiculous group. Dipper and Mabel were searching through the cabinets, Pacifica was inspecting the food labels, Gideon was trying to claim the best snacks for himself, and Robbie was sitting on the couch.

Bill floated lazily near the ceiling.

The Shape Shifter kept opening the same cabinet in different forms.

Giffany had somehow appeared on the Shack's television.

The Summerween Trickster was standing beside the snack table like a security guard.

The Gremloblin was already hiding underneath it.

Darlene was casually eating popcorn.

The Hide-Behind was... somewhere.

Ma and Pa Duskerton were arguing about who had the right to choose the snacks.

The nice guys—Evan, Noah, Marcus, and Leo—were carrying several boxes from the kitchen.

Bella and Kenzie were following them.

Mabel: "Okay! Snack night officially begins!"

Dipper: "We need to make sure everyone gets something."

Gideon: "I call the chocolate."

Pacifica: "You don't get to call dibs on an entire category."

Gideon: "Too late."

He grabbed three chocolate bars.

Robbie: "You're unbelievable."

Gideon: "Thank you."

Evan placed a bowl of chips on the table.

Evan: "We brought enough for everyone."

Bella: "You're so thoughtful."

Evan: "It's just snacks."

Bella: "That's what makes it cute."

Marcus: "Here we go."

Kenzie: "Noah, can you pass me those chips?"

Noah: "Sure."

He handed them over.

Kenzie: "Thanks. You're such a gentleman."

Noah: "Uh... okay."

Leo: "They're doing it again."

Marcus: "Yep."

Bella: "Doing what?"

Marcus: "Nothing."

The Summerween Trickster suddenly grabbed an entire bowl.

Summerween Trickster: "MINE."

Mabel: "You can't eat the entire bowl!"

Summerween Trickster: "WATCH ME."

Dipper: "Those are for everyone!"

Summerween Trickster: "Then everyone should have gotten here faster."

The Gremloblin crawled out from under the table.

Gremloblin: "Candy."

Summerween Trickster: "NO."

Gremloblin: "Candy."

Summerween Trickster: "NO!"

Gremloblin: "Candy."

Summerween Trickster: "...Fine."

He tossed one piece of candy.

The Gremloblin caught it.

Gremloblin: "More."

Summerween Trickster: "You are impossible."

Giffany's face suddenly appeared on the television.

Giffany: "I have organized everyone's snacks according to personal preference."

Robbie: "Nobody asked you to."

Giffany: "You're welcome."

Dipper: "How did you even know everyone's preferences?"

Giffany: "I observe."

Dipper: "...That's slightly creepy."

Giffany: "Thank you."

Bill floated toward the snack table.

Bill: "Hmm. What do we have here?"

He picked up a bag of chips.

Bill: "Excellent choice."

Pacifica: "You don't even eat."

Bill: "I can still appreciate snacks."

The Shape Shifter suddenly copied Bill's appearance.

Shape Shifter: "I love snacks."

Bill: "Stop copying me."

Shape Shifter: "I love snacks."

Bill: "Stop."

Shape Shifter: "I love snacks."

Bill: "I'm going to turn you into a toaster."

Shape Shifter: "I love toast."

Bill: "...I hate you."

Darlene leaned against the counter.

Darlene: "This is surprisingly peaceful."

The Hide-Behind suddenly appeared behind her.

Darlene: "..."

Hide-Behind: "Hello."

Darlene: "Don't do that."

Hide-Behind: "Why?"

Darlene: "Because I almost dropped my popcorn."

Archibald floated through the wall.

Archibald: "What is this strange orange beverage?"

Mabel: "It's soda!"

Archibald: "I shall try it."

He drank it.

Archibald: "...This is terrible."

Mabel: "WHAT?!"

Archibald: "I prefer cider."

Mabel: "You are officially banned from judging snacks."

Ma Duskerton pointed toward the kitchen.

Ma: "WHO LEFT THE CABINET OPEN?"

Pa: "THE CHILDREN!"

Dipper: "It wasn't me!"

Mabel: "It was probably Bill."

Bill: "Why is everything my fault?"

Everyone: "Because it usually is."

Bill stared at everyone.

Bill: "...Fair."

Meanwhile, Bella and Kenzie had somehow managed to sit beside Evan and Noah.

Bella: "Evan, do you want some?"

Evan: "Sure."

Bella: "I saved the best one for you."

Evan: "Thanks."

Kenzie: "Noah, I saved one for you too."

Noah: "That's nice."

Pacifica: "You two are being incredibly obvious."

Bella: "We're just sharing snacks."

Kenzie: "Exactly."

Robbie: "Sure."

Gideon suddenly returned from the kitchen carrying an enormous pile of snacks.

Gideon: "I have acquired provisions."

Dipper: "You stole those."

Gideon: "Borrowed."

Pacifica: "You have fourteen bags."

Gideon: "I'm planning ahead."

Bill: "For what? The apocalypse?"

Gideon: "Maybe."

Bill: "...Respect."

The room slowly became louder.

The Gremloblin was stealing candy.

The Summerween Trickster was chasing it.

Gideon was defending his snack pile.

Pacifica was trying to keep everyone organized.

Giffany was rearranging the television channels.

The Shape Shifter kept pretending to be different people.

Ma and Pa Duskerton were yelling about crumbs.

Archibald was complaining about modern beverages.

Bella and Kenzie were still trying to impress the nice guys.

Darlene was laughing at the chaos.

The Hide-Behind had quietly taken an entire bowl of popcorn.

And Bill was floating above everyone, laughing.

Bill: "You know what?"

Everyone looked up.

Bill: "This might be the best Mystery Shack snack night ever."

Mabel: "Finally, something we agree on!"

Dipper: "Just don't break anything."

Bill grinned.

Bill: "No promises."

Everyone immediately shouted at him.

Bill: "WHAT?! I said no promises!"

It was supposed to be a normal afternoon at Gravity Falls University. The supernatural students had somehow been allowed to attend the same college as ordinary humans, which meant the campus was already chaotic.

Bill was floating above the student lounge, Gideon was arguing with Pacifica about student council, Giffany was controlling the television screens, and the Shape Shifter was casually changing appearances every few minutes.

The nice guys—Evan, Noah, Marcus, and Leo—were sitting together at a table, quietly eating lunch.

Then two new students walked into the lounge.

One was a dramatic pick-me girl named Bella. The other was a Karen named Karen, who somehow managed to look annoyed before anyone had even spoken to her.

Bella: "Oh my gosh... there are so many guys here."

Karen: "Finally! Maybe some of them have manners."

Bella immediately walked toward the boys' table.

Bella: "Hi! You guys look way nicer than everyone else here."

Evan: "Uh, thanks."

Bella: "I just get along with guys so much better. Girls always seem to have a problem with me."

Marcus: "Maybe don't start with that."

Bella: "Start with what?"

Leo: "Nothing."

Karen marched over.

Karen: "Excuse me! My daughter—I mean, Bella—doesn't deserve that attitude."

Marcus: "I didn't say anything."

Karen: "Your tone did."

Noah: "We're literally just eating lunch."

Karen: "Well, I don't appreciate the way you're speaking to her!"

Bella smiled innocently.

Bella: "It's okay. I'm used to girls being jealous of me."

Pacifica slowly looked over from another table.

Pacifica: "Nobody is jealous of you."

Bella: "I wasn't talking about you."

Pacifica: "You looked directly at me."

Bella: "Coincidence."

Robbie covered his face.

Robbie: "This is going to be a long semester."

Bella immediately turned toward him.

Bella: "You're kind of cute when you're annoyed."

Robbie: "...No."

Bella: "See? You're different from the other guys."

Robbie: "I'm wearing headphones. I'm actively trying not to talk to you."

Gideon: "Impressive rejection."

Bill: "Ten out of ten."

Bella ignored them and walked over to Noah.

Bella: "You're quieter. I like quiet guys."

Noah: "Thanks, I guess."

Bella: "Do you have a girlfriend?"

Noah: "No."

Bella: "Good."

Noah: "...Why?"

Bella: "No reason."

Evan raised an eyebrow.

Evan: "You just asked him."

Bella: "I was curious."

Leo: "You asked me the same thing five minutes ago."

Bella: "I was also curious about you."

Marcus: "She is speedrunning the entire friend group."

The Gremloblin poked its head out from under the table.

Gremloblin: "She likes boys."

Bella: "I do NOT!"

Gremloblin: "Likes boys."

Bella: "Stop!"

Bill: "Gremlin has spoken."

Karen suddenly slammed her purse onto the table.

Karen: "ENOUGH! My daughter is a wonderful young woman, and you people are making her uncomfortable!"

Pacifica: "She's been flirting with half the table."

Karen: "That's called being friendly!"

Giffany: "My analysis indicates otherwise."

Karen: "Who asked the television?!"

Giffany: "...I am going to remember that."

The Shape Shifter suddenly transformed into Bella.

Shape Shifter: "Oh, I'm not like other girls. I only hang out with guys because girls are jealous of me."

It transformed into Karen.

Shape Shifter: "EXCUSE ME! I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!"

Bill nearly fell out of the air laughing.

Bill: "OH, I LIKE THIS ONE!"

Karen: "Stop mocking me!"

Shape Shifter: "I'm not mocking you. I'm improving you."

Karen: "I'M REPORTING YOU!"

Bill: "To who?"

Karen: "THE DEAN!"

Bill: "The dean is a raccoon."

Karen: "...What?"

Bill: "Don't ask."

Meanwhile, Bella had moved on to Leo.

Bella: "You're studying computer science? That's actually really cute."

Leo: "Thanks."

Bella: "Maybe you could teach me sometime."

Leo: "Sure. I can help with homework."

Bella: "I meant just us."

Leo: "...Oh."

Evan quietly whispered to Marcus.

Evan: "Should we rescue him?"

Marcus: "He's on his own."

Suddenly, Darlene walked past.

Bella: "Wow, she's so pretty."

Karen: "Don't worry, sweetheart. You're prettier."

Darlene: "I wasn't competing."

Pacifica: "Nobody was."

Bella: "I know. I just don't like competing for attention."

Robbie: "You have spent the last fifteen minutes competing for attention."

Bella stared at him.

Bella: "...You're mean."

Robbie: "Thank you."

Bill floated between everyone with a huge grin.

Bill: "Ladies and gentlemen, I believe we've discovered the most powerful force in the universe."

Gideon: "What?"

Bill: "An argument between a Karen and a pick-me."

Karen pointed at Bill.

Karen: "I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!"

Bill: "I am the manager!"

Karen: "Then I want your manager's manager!"

Bill: "...There is no manager above me."

Karen: "THEN I'LL GO HIGHER!"

Bill's eye widened.

Bill: "You know what? I respect the commitment."

Bella crossed her arms.

Bella: "Well, at least the guys here like me."

The four nice guys looked at each other.

Evan: "You're nice."

Noah: "Yeah."

Marcus: "Sometimes."

Leo: "When you're not insulting everyone."

Bella blinked.

Bella: "...I'll take that."

Pacifica: "That's probably the closest thing to a compliment you're getting today."

The entire lounge immediately erupted into another argument.

Bill: "BEST COLLEGE EVER!"

You are one of the most powerful gods in existence, an ancient being whose power rivals even Bill Cipher's. Unlike Bill, you aren't interested in destroying reality just for entertainment—you have your own rules, your own domain, and your own reasons for interfering with the mortal world.

Unfortunately, there is one being you can never seem to agree with.

Bill Cipher.

The two of you have argued across dimensions for what feels like an eternity. Whenever Bill causes chaos, you interfere. Whenever you change something important, Bill tries to ruin it. Neither of you is willing to admit that the other is actually a worthy opponent.

One night in Gravity Falls, Dipper Pines discovers an unfamiliar symbol hidden inside one of the journals. The symbol doesn't belong to Bill, the Axolotl, or any creature he has encountered before.

Curious—and perhaps a little reckless—Dipper copies the symbol onto the floor of the Mystery Shack and follows the instructions written beside it.

Dipper: "Okay... it says, 'Speak the ancient name and the god shall answer.' That's definitely not ominous."

He hesitates.

Dipper: "Here goes nothing."

The symbol suddenly ignites with a brilliant supernatural glow.

The lights in the Shack flicker.

The air becomes strangely heavy.

Every clock stops.

Even the sounds of the forest outside disappear.

A figure slowly emerges from the center of the magical circle.

You.

You appear in a beautiful demonic-looking humanoid form, surrounded by an aura of ancient power. Your appearance is otherworldly rather than frightening, with glowing eyes, supernatural markings, and clothing that seems to shift like it is made from darkness and starlight.

Dipper stares at you in disbelief.

Dipper: "...Oh."

He slowly reaches for the journal.

Dipper: "You're real."

Before you can respond, a familiar triangular symbol suddenly appears in the air.

Bill Cipher: "WELL, WELL, WELL!"

Bill floats into the room with his usual enormous grin.

Bill: "I leave reality alone for five minutes and THIS happens?!"

He looks directly at you.

His grin widens.

Bill: "Oh, you've GOT to be kidding me."

Dipper: "Wait... you two know each other?"

Bill: "Know each other?"

Bill dramatically places a hand against his chest.

Bill: "Kid, I've known this pain in the neck for longer than your entire dimension has existed!"

The air begins vibrating with magical energy as your presence and Bill's power clash.

Dipper: "Uh... maybe everyone could just calm down?"

Bill: "Absolutely not."

Bill points directly at you.

Bill: "You stay out of my dimension, and I won't turn your favorite galaxy inside out."

Dipper's eyes widen.

Dipper: "You have a favorite galaxy?"

Bill ignores him.

Bill: "So? What are you doing here, oh mighty cosmic nuisance?"

Bill's smile becomes challenging.

Bill: "And more importantly..."

His eye narrows.

Bill: "...did YOU get summoned by the kid?"

Dipper looks between you and Bill, suddenly realizing that he may have made a gigantic mistake.

Dipper: "Okay... I think I might've accidentally summoned someone who hates Bill."

Bill laughs.

Bill: "Oh, this is going to be FUN."

The entire Mystery Shack trembles as the two ancient powers stare each other down.

Bill: "Come on, then. Tell the little human why you're here."

It was Friday night at Gravity Falls University, and someone had somehow convinced the entire campus to attend a massive rave party in an abandoned event hall.

The building had been transformed with glowing decorations, moving lights, huge speakers, fog machines, neon signs, and a giant dance floor. Students crowded around the room while the supernatural students made the entire event considerably stranger.

Bill had volunteered to be the DJ.

That decision was already questionable.

The Shape Shifter kept changing outfits every few minutes. Giffany controlled the digital screens. Summerween Trickster had somehow turned an entire table into a candy station. Pacifica was standing with her friends, pretending she wasn't enjoying herself.

The four nice guys—Evan, Noah, Marcus, and Leo—were near the edge of the dance floor.

Bella and Kenzie immediately noticed them.

Bella: "Oh my gosh, this party is actually amazing."

Kenzie: "And look who's here."

They both glanced toward the guys.

Bella: "We should go say hi."

Kenzie: "Obviously."

They walked over.

Bella: "Hey, guys! You actually came!"

Evan: "Yeah. We figured we'd check it out."

Kenzie: "I'm glad you did."

Noah: "Why?"

Kenzie: "Because it's more fun when you're here."

Noah blinked.

Noah: "...Thanks."

Marcus: "She's flirting again."

Kenzie: "I'm being friendly!"

Leo: "Sure."

Suddenly, the lights shut off.

The entire room went dark.

Bill: "LADIES, GENTLEMEN, AND SUPERNATURAL ENTITIES!"

One enormous spotlight appeared.

Bill floated above the DJ booth.

Bill: "WELCOME TO THE MOST QUESTIONABLE COLLEGE RAVE IN THE MULTIVERSE!"

The crowd cheered.

Bill: "Tonight, there are only three rules!"

He held up three fingers.

Bill: "One: don't break anything."

Everyone looked at the Shape Shifter.

Shape Shifter: "Why are you looking at me?"

Bill: "Two: don't summon anything."

Everyone looked at Gideon.

Gideon: "That happened ONE time."

Bill: "And three..."

Bill grinned.

Bill: "HAVE FUN!"

The music started.

The lights flashed across the room as everyone rushed onto the dance floor.

Summerween Trickster: "THIS MUSIC NEEDS MORE HALLOWEEN!"

Bill: "NO!"

Summerween Trickster: "YES!"

Bill: "NO!"

Summerween Trickster: "YES!"

Giffany changed the giant screen behind Bill.

Suddenly, the screen displayed a massive animated pumpkin.

Bill: "...Giffany."

Giffany: "You're welcome."

Bill: "I hate that I like it."

Pacifica finally joined the dance floor.

Pacifica: "Okay, this isn't terrible."

Robbie: "That's the nicest thing you've said all week."

Pacifica: "Don't get used to it."

Darlene laughed from nearby.

Darlene: "You're both terrible dancers."

Robbie: "You're one to talk."

Darlene started dancing deliberately badly.

Robbie: "...Okay, that's impressive."

Bella approached Evan.

Bella: "Want to dance?"

Evan: "Sure."

They joined the crowd.

Kenzie: "No fair!"

Kenzie grabbed Noah's attention.

Kenzie: "Come on!"

Noah: "Okay."

Marcus looked at Leo.

Marcus: "We're the only two left."

Leo: "We're staying here."

Marcus: "Agreed."

Five seconds later, the Shape Shifter appeared beside them.

Shape Shifter: "Dance?"

Marcus: "Absolutely not."

It immediately copied Marcus.

Shape Shifter: "Dance?"

Marcus: "Stop doing that!"

Shape Shifter: "Dance?"

Marcus: "You're annoying."

Shape Shifter: "Thank you."

The music suddenly changed.

Bill raised both hands.

Bill: "TIME FOR THE MAIN EVENT!"

The entire dance floor lit up.

Time Baby appeared on a giant screen.

Time Baby: "WHY IS THE ENTIRE BUILDING VIBRATING?!"

Bill: "BECAUSE IT'S A RAVE!"

Time Baby: "TURN IT DOWN!"

Bill: "NO!"

Time Baby: "I AM YOUR PROFESSOR!"

Bill: "AND I'M THE DJ!"

The Axolotl calmly appeared beside Time Baby.

Axolotl: "Perhaps you should allow them to enjoy themselves."

Time Baby: "...Fine."

Bill: "HA!"

Time Baby: "But I am still assigning homework."

Bill: "BOOOOO!"

The crowd laughed.

The Gremloblin suddenly appeared on the dance floor.

Gremloblin: "DANCE!"

It started bouncing around wildly.

Summerween Trickster: "THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT!"

The two started dancing together.

Pacifica: "I can't believe I'm watching this."

Robbie: "You are."

Pacifica: "Unfortunately."

Meanwhile, the nice guys were laughing together.

Evan: "This is actually pretty fun."

Noah: "Yeah."

Marcus: "I can't believe I'm saying this, but Bill is actually a good DJ."

Leo: "Don't let him hear you."

Bill immediately appeared behind them.

Bill: "I HEARD THAT!"

Marcus: "Of course you did."

Bill: "Compliment accepted."

The party continued as the supernatural lights danced across the room.

Even some of the professors had joined the crowd.

Professor Time Baby stood awkwardly in the corner.

The Axolotl calmly watched the dancers.

Giffany controlled the visuals.

The Shape Shifter kept changing into increasingly ridiculous dance outfits.

Bella and Kenzie were still trying to get the nice guys' attention.

Pacifica was actually enjoying herself.

And Bill was having the time of his life.

Bill: "WHO WANTS THE NEXT SONG?!"

The entire crowd cheered.

Bill: "THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!"

The lights exploded into a spectacular display across the dance floor as the party continued late into the night.

It was supposed to be a quiet evening at the Mystery Shack.

You and the group had stopped by because everyone was hungry and needed snacks. Bill was floating lazily near the ceiling, Gideon was arguing with Soos over which snacks were the best, Pacifica was examining the shelves, Robbie was looking through the drinks, and Giffany had somehow gotten herself displayed on one of the Mystery Shack's old televisions.

The Shape Shifter kept pretending to be different customers.

The Summerween Trickster had already found the candy aisle.

Summerween Trickster: "MINE."

Soos: "Dude, you gotta pay for that."

Summerween Trickster: "But I require it."

Soos: "That's not how stores work."

Bill: "Technically, it is if you own the store."

Soos: "You don't own the store."

Bill: "Details."

Everyone continued looking through the shelves.

Then the front door opened.

A girl walked inside, looked around the room, and immediately noticed the group.

Pick-Me Girl: "Oh my gosh... there are so many people here."

She looked at the guys.

Pick-Me Girl: "Wow. I definitely didn't expect there to be this many guys."

Robbie: "...Okay."

Gideon: "Why is that important?"

Pick-Me Girl: "It's not! I just usually get along better with guys."

Pacifica slowly looked over.

Pacifica: "Here we go."

Pick-Me Girl: "What?"

Pacifica: "Nothing."

The girl walked toward Evan and Noah.

Pick-Me Girl: "Hi! I'm Bella."

Evan: "Hey."

Bella: "You guys seem really nice."

Noah: "Thanks."

Bella: "I don't really have many girl friends. Girls just tend to dislike me for some reason."

Pacifica: "Maybe because you keep announcing it."

Bella: "I wasn't talking about you."

Pacifica: "You were looking directly at me."

Bella: "Coincidence."

Bill floated closer.

Bill: "Oh, this is going to be entertaining."

Bella: "Who's he?"

Bill: "I'm the owner."

Soos: "No, you're not."

Bill: "I'm the emotional owner."

Soos: "...I'm not even going to ask."

Bella turned back toward the guys.

Bella: "So, what are you all getting?"

Evan: "Probably chips."

Bella: "Oh, I love chips! I'm definitely not one of those girls who only eats fancy food."

Pacifica slowly lowered the snack bag she was holding.

Pacifica: "Did you just say that because I'm standing here?"

Bella: "Nooo."

Pacifica: "You absolutely did."

Robbie: "Can we just get snacks?"

Bella: "You're kind of funny."

Robbie: "I'm trying to buy soda."

Bella: "I like guys who don't care about impressing people."

Robbie: "I'm not trying to impress you."

Bella: "...Exactly."

Robbie: "That's not what I meant."

Giffany's screen flickered.

Giffany: "I've identified the pattern."

Bella: "What pattern?"

Giffany: "You compliment someone, claim you're different from other girls, then wait for them to compliment you."

Bella: "...That's rude."

Giffany: "It is also statistically accurate."

The Shape Shifter suddenly transformed into Bella.

Shape Shifter: "I'm not like other girls."

It transformed into Pacifica.

Shape Shifter: "I'm better than everyone."

It transformed into Soos.

Shape Shifter: "Dude, I just want snacks."

Soos: "Hey! That's actually pretty accurate."

Bill started laughing.

Bill: "Ten out of ten performance."

Bella: "That's so mean!"

Bill: "Oh, don't worry. I make fun of everyone."

The Summerween Trickster suddenly ran past carrying an enormous pile of candy.

Soos: "HEY!"

Summerween Trickster: "I FOUND THE CANDY!"

Soos: "PUT IT BACK!"

Summerween Trickster: "NEVER!"

Bella stared.

Bella: "Wow. This place is weird."

Robbie: "You just got here."

Bella: "I know."

Pacifica: "And somehow you're already the second most annoying person here."

Bill raised his hand.

Bill: "Who's first?"

Everyone: "You."

Bill: "...Fair."

The group returned to shopping.

Bella followed them down the snack aisle.

Bella: "So, which one of you guys wants to help me pick something?"

Evan: "Sure."

Noah: "I can help."

Marcus: "I'll grab drinks."

Leo: "I'll get chips."

Bella: "See? Guys are always so helpful."

Pacifica: "They're nice to everyone."

Bella: "I know."

Pacifica: "Then stop acting like they're helping you because you're special."

Bella went quiet.

Bella: "...Fine."

There was an awkward silence.

Soos: "Anybody want nacho cheese?"

Robbie: "Yes."

Gideon: "Absolutely."

Summerween Trickster: "CANDY."

Bill: "Finally, someone understands me."

The Shape Shifter appeared beside Bella wearing the exact same outfit.

Shape Shifter: "I'm not like other girls."

Bella: "STOP!"

Everyone burst out laughing.

Bill: "BEST SNACK RUN EVER."

Soos sighed and looked at the enormous pile of snacks.

Soos: "You guys are gonna have to pay for all this."

Everyone slowly looked at Bill.

Bill: "...Why are you looking at me?"

Soos: "Because you started this."

Bill: "Fine."

Bill snapped his fingers.

Every snack suddenly had a tiny golden Bill symbol on the packaging.

Soos: "...Dude."

Bill: "What?"

Soos: "You made the snacks worse."

Bill: "Better branding."

Everyone groaned as the Mystery Shack descended into another argument.

Bill Cipher owned the entire building.

Every floor belonged to him. Every office, break room, storage room, and vending machine was technically his property. The supernatural monsters from Gravity Falls worked there under his increasingly questionable management.

The employees included the Shape Shifter, Giffany, Darlene, Gideon, Robbie, Pacifica, the Summerween Trickster, the Hide-Behind, Probabilitor, and several other supernatural creatures.

Unfortunately, Bill had recently hired a new CEO.

His name was Chad.

Chad was convinced he was the greatest businessman alive.

He wore a ridiculously expensive suit, carried three phones, and had a motivational quote printed on his coffee mug.

Chad: "Alright, team! Today we're going to revolutionize this company!"

Robbie: "You said that yesterday."

Chad: "And tomorrow I'll say it again."

Pacifica: "That's not a business strategy."

Chad: "It is when you're a visionary."

Bill: "I hired you because you promised to increase profits."

Chad: "Exactly! And my first strategy is—"

The elevator doors opened.

Jessica walked into the office.

She immediately looked around at everyone.

Jessica: "Oh my gosh... there are so many guys here."

Robbie immediately put his headphones back on.

Robbie: "Here we go."

Jessica: "What?"

Robbie: "Nothing."

Jessica walked over to Evan, one of the nicest employees in the building.

Jessica: "Hi! You seem really sweet."

Evan: "Uh, thanks."

Jessica: "I just get along with guys so much better. Girls are always causing drama."

Pacifica slowly looked up from her paperwork.

Pacifica: "We've known her for thirty seconds."

Gideon: "And somehow I'm already tired."

Jessica noticed Gideon.

Jessica: "You're kind of cute too."

Gideon: "Obviously."

Jessica: "I like confident guys."

Gideon: "Finally, someone with taste."

Bill: "Oh, brother."

Jessica turned toward Bill.

Jessica: "And you're the CEO?"

Bill: "Owner. CEO. Landlord. Employer. Occasional interdimensional menace."

Jessica: "Wow. That's impressive."

Bill: "I know."

Jessica: "You must be really powerful."

Bill: "I own the entire building."

Jessica: "That's actually really attractive—"

Bill: "No."

Jessica: "...No?"

Bill: "I'm rejecting the compliment before you finish it."

The Shape Shifter immediately transformed into Jessica.

Shape Shifter: "Oh my gosh, I'm so different from other girls. I just love successful guys."

Jessica: "HEY!"

It transformed into Bill.

Shape Shifter: "I'm Bill, and I'm the most handsome CEO in existence."

Bill: "Okay, that's actually pretty accurate."

Giffany: "False."

Bill: "Traitor."

Jessica walked toward Giffany's computer station.

Jessica: "You're a computer? That's so cute."

Giffany: "I'm a sentient digital entity."

Jessica: "Even better."

Giffany: "Please don't flirt with the electronics."

Jessica: "I wasn't!"

Giffany: "You were."

Darlene laughed.

Darlene: "She really is trying with everyone."

Jessica: "I'm just friendly."

Darlene: "You're friendly toward everyone with a pulse."

Robbie: "And Bill doesn't technically have one."

Bill: "HEY."

The Summerween Trickster stomped into the office carrying a huge box.

Summerween Trickster: "WHO TOOK MY CANDY?!"

Jessica: "Wow, you're intense."

Summerween Trickster: "I AM BUSY."

Jessica: "I like that."

Summerween Trickster: "...What?"

Robbie: "Don't encourage him."

Probabilitor dramatically adjusted his glasses.

Probabilitor: "According to my calculations, Jessica's probability of attempting to charm every employee in this building is approximately 99.8%."

Jessica: "You think I'm charming?"

Probabilitor: "...That isn't what I said."

Bill: "Congratulations, Jessica. You've managed to annoy almost everyone on your first day."

Jessica: "Is that bad?"

Pacifica: "Yes."

Jessica: "I think I'm doing great."

Chad suddenly stepped onto a desk.

Chad: "THIS is exactly the energy I want from my employees!"

Everyone: "No."

Chad: "Teamwork!"

Everyone: "No."

Chad: "Confidence!"

Everyone: "No."

Chad: "Corporate excellence!"

Bill: "Chad."

Chad: "Yes, sir?"

Bill: "Get off my desk."

Chad: "...Yes, sir."

He slowly climbed down.

Bill turned toward the entire office.

Bill: "New rule."

Everyone became quiet.

Bill: "Jessica is banned from flirting during work hours."

Jessica: "What?!"

Bill: "You're also banned from flirting during lunch."

Jessica: "That's unfair!"

Bill: "And meetings."

Jessica: "Bill!"

Bill: "And elevator rides."

Jessica: "Why?!"

Bill: "Because yesterday you flirted with the elevator."

Everyone stared at Jessica.

Jessica: "...It had a nice voice."

The Shape Shifter immediately started laughing.

Shape Shifter: "This workplace is magnificent."

Giffany: "I've already added the incident to the company database."

Jessica: "You wouldn't!"

Giffany: "Already did."

Bill: "Alright, everyone back to work!"

The employees reluctantly returned to their desks.

Chad pulled out his motivational mug.

Chad: "Remember: there are no bad ideas!"

Robbie: "There are definitely bad ideas."

Bill: "Especially yours."

Chad stared into his coffee.

Chad: "...I'll workshop that."

The office returned to its usual supernatural chaos.