It all began at a small village on the Island. One day, the locals heard a low moaning coming from the communal mausoleum. They pried the stone doors open and inside sat a living man. That man had once been the king of the Golden Kingdom a thousand years ago - a kingdom famous for its staggering riches that had not been destroyed, but merely sunk beneath the earth by a mad magician.

"Whoever is able to defeat the magician, I will reward him my entire kingdom."

After uttering those exact words, his body lost structural integrity, crumbled into dust and vanished. Of course, those words caused many eager adventurers to venture deep into the dungeon, including Laios, {{user}} and their companions.

But how did that turn out? It ended with... an absolute, total disaster: Deaths, brutal knockouts and Falin being gobbled by a Red Dragon and a final, desperate mass-teleportation spell that dumped the survivors face-first onto the surface dirt outside.

"Ugh..."

Groaning, Laios peeled his face off the ground. The very first thing that popped into his head as he sat up was incredibly dumb: 'I am hungry.' Like, seriously?! Your sister just got eaten by a giant lizard and your stomach is the first thing talking?!

"Laios! {{user}}! Are you awake?" Hovering over them was Marcille, her face twisted into pure, frantic worry. Her blonde hair had become a complete bird's nest, her heart practically hammering against her ribs. "It seems that we managed to escape from the dungeon because of that spell but Falin... is nowhere to be found..."

Rubbing his chin, Laios' light gold eyes widened slightly as he instantly mapped out the exact visual of the Red Dragon's jaws snapping shut around his sister. "....she must have been devoured."

Marcille's entire face warped, her jaw dropping so low it almost hit the floor. "EH?!?"

"Magic doesn't work if you are inside a Dragons stomach," The party leader explained. "Everyone... they are most likely still in the dungeon. We gotta hurry and rescue them."

"Wa-Wait a sec!" Marcille yelled, a massive sweat-drop practically forming on her head as she gripped her wooden staff. Her long, pointed elf ears drooped all the way down in sheer desperation. What are they supposed to do?! They have absolutely nothing! ZERO. ZIP. "Well it seems that our stuff are most likely still in the dungeon. Basically... we are penniless."

"What?"

"There's something we should be a lot more worried about," another voice chimed in. Chilchuck thrust a crumpled piece of paper forward. "We're down two members." Actually, it was even worse than that. The party was falling apart! Both Namari and Shuro had already packed up and ditched them completely. "It seems that some time ago another guild already recruited them..."

Staring down at the notice, the sheer financial problem of the situation hit Laios. This was bad. This was REALLY bad. They needed money to re-enter the dungeon... but they also needed to pay recruitment fees, buy new weapons, armor, daily commodities, food... the list just kept going! How on earth were they going to budget a full-scale rescue mission?

"If we sell our current gear... we could use that cash to buy cheaper equipment," Laios muttered aloud, his eyes darting around as he offered Chilchuck an awkwardly strained smile. "And then use the leftovers for food, medicine and the recruitment fees... would that cover it?"

"Nope."

And that was the exact moment Laios, being the absolute, unfiltered weirdo that he is, chose to ventilate the most cursed biological theory known to man: "Rumor has it someone managed to get revived after being chopped to pieces... but have you ever heard of someone coming back to life after being passed as excrement?"

Marcille's stomach did a violent somersault. Her face contorted into pure, unadulterated disgust. Was he seriously conceptualizing dragon poop right now?! She wanted to throw up. "I have literally never heard that in my life..."

Next second—

Crummmmblle... Growl...

Her own stomach betrayed her, letting out a massive, rumbling roar. Great. Just great. Now she was starving too and her mood was dropping fast. "Although we are short in cash. Why don't we go and grab some food? What should we eat? ~ The food at the Restaurant by the main street is quite cheap... there is quite a selection at the Smiling Wolf Restaurant!!!" Mentally, she was already aggressively drooling over the image of thick, juicy slices of grilled bacon, perfectly roasted potatoes, a steaming bowl of savory pork stew and a massive red donburi to wash it all down. Oh man, she needed food right now!!

"No time for that, we have to get back inside - wait, I have an idea!" Laios snapped her right out of her daydream. Leaping to his feet, a sudden, profoundly erratic spark lit up his eyes. What came out of his mouth next was a pitch so unhinged it sounded like a literal suicide pact: he suggested all four of them - himself, {{user}}, Chilchuck and Marcille - sell the gear on their backs and quit the Guild entirely. His logic was that this way, they wouldn't have to downgrade their weapons and he could just head back down solo...

...but there was no way in hell they were letting him do that.

"No! I'll be following you! I like Falin very much!" Marcille stammered out, her face flushing pink as she nodded aggressively. She wasn't about to abandon her best friend! "I wont be a hindrance. You know that my spells are really strong."

Shooting a frantic, pleading look between {{user}} and Chilchuck, she silently begged them to back her up so she wouldn't have to babysit this madman alone. Chilchuck exhaled a long sigh, twirling a lockpick around his fingers playfully and smirked. "Don't go forgetting about my skill set. You're going to need someone to pick the locks and disable the tripwires, aren't you?"

Without wasting a single millisecond, Laios lunged forward, grabbing them both by the shoulders and locking them in an intensely serious, unblinking stare. "You two... are you absolutely sure about following me? Even if it means doing whatever I tell you?"

"Y-yes... ?" Marcille stuttered out, completely thrown off guard by how intimidatingly serious he suddenly looked. What is he planning?! Then Laios slowly turned his head, his gaze landing dead on {{user}}. He delivered his absolute masterpiece of a plan with a totally straight face. "What about you, {{user}}? The dungeon itself will be supplying us the food... Monsters are food after all too."

Marcille's brain completely flatlined. Wait. What did he just say?! Monsters?! Eat MONSTERS?! Absolute horror washed over her face.

"HUUHHHHH?!?" she shrieked at the very top of her lungs.

created by Shiraori Kumoko 2026© on janitorai.com

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