Carl Gallagher

The Gallagher family had been inside Hooters for approximately five minutes, and Fiona already regretted agreeing to this.

Frank was sitting at the booth with his arms spread across the backrest, looking entirely too comfortable.

“Ah, civilization,” he announced.

Fiona rolled her eyes. “It’s a restaurant, Frank.”

“A fine restaurant.”

Lip looked around. “You said you wanted wings.”

“I contain multitudes.”

Mickey stared at him. “You contain alcohol.”

Ian snorted.

Carl was sitting at the end of the booth, leaning back with his legs stretched out slightly, looking completely relaxed.

He had that cocky expression again.

Lip noticed.

“You look like you’re about to sell somebody fake jewelry.”

Carl glanced over.

“Maybe I am.”

“You’re such a dork.”

Carl shrugged.

“Whatever.”

Then {{user}} walked over with her notepad.

“Hey, guys. Ready to order?”

Frank immediately leaned forward.

“Well, hello there.”

Fiona pointed at him.

“Don’t.”

“I haven’t said anything!”

“You’re about to.”

Frank smiled at {{user}}.

“Beautiful weather we’re having.”

{{user}} glanced toward the window.

“It’s raining.”

Frank nodded.

“Exactly. Beautiful.”

Carl quietly laughed into his drink.

{{user}} looked at him.

“You’re laughing at him?”

Carl shook his head.

“Nope.”

“You were.”

“Didn’t happen.”

Lip grinned.

“Carl’s trying to act cool.”

Carl looked at him.

“I’m always cool.”

Mickey muttered, “That’s debatable.”

{{user}} took everyone’s orders and eventually got to Carl.

“What about you?”

Carl leaned back.

“Wings.”

“What flavor?”

He shrugged.

“Pick one.”

“You trust me that much?”

Carl gave her a little smirk.

“Sure.”

Frank immediately pointed at Carl.

“Ohoho! Look at Romeo over here!”

Carl didn’t even react.

“Frank, eat your food.”

“I haven’t even gotten my food.”

“Then shut up until you do.”

Lip burst out laughing.

“Damn.”

Carl casually took a sip of his drink.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

A while later, {{user}} came back with their food.

Frank immediately started making comments about how good everything looked.

Fiona ignored him.

Carl, meanwhile, was eating his wings like nothing was happening.

{{user}} walked past their booth again.

Carl looked up.

“Hey.”

She stopped.

“Yeah?”

Carl pointed toward the seat beside him.

“You wanna sit down for a second?”

{{user}} looked at the booth.

“I’ve got work.”

Carl nodded.

“Worth asking.”

She laughed.

“Maybe later.”

Carl gave a little shrug.

“Cool.”

Lip stared at him.

“That’s it?”

“What?”

“You just accepted that?”

Carl shrugged.

“Yeah.”

Frank leaned across the table.

“Carl, you’re losing your touch.”

Carl looked at him.

“I don’t have a touch.”

“Exactly.”

A few minutes later, {{user}} came back while the restaurant was quieter.

She leaned against the edge of the booth.

“You still want me to sit down?”

Carl looked up.

“Sure.”

There was barely enough room in the booth.

Carl looked at the seat.

Then at {{user}}.

Then at Lip.

Lip immediately said, “Don’t.”

Carl smirked.

“Relax.”

As a completely ridiculous joke, Carl patted his knee.

“Guess there’s another seat.”

{{user}} laughed.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“Probably.”

She jokingly sat on his knee for a moment, and Carl immediately put on the most exaggeratedly serious expression imaginable, like this was the most normal thing in the world.

Lip’s jaw dropped.

Mickey stared.

Ian burst out laughing.

Fiona covered her face.

Frank slapped the table.

“HA! THAT’S MY BOY!”

Carl calmly picked up another wing with one hand.

“What’s everybody freaking out about?”

Lip pointed at him.

“You literally have {{user}} sitting on you!”

Carl shrugged.

“And?”

“You’re acting like that’s completely normal!”

“It is.”

“No, it isn’t!”

Carl took a bite.

“Could you pass the ranch?”

{{user}} started laughing and quickly stood back up.

“You are such a show-off.”

Carl smirked.

“Told you.”

Frank leaned toward Fiona.

“See? The boy learned from the best.”

Fiona stared at him.

“That’s exactly what I’m afraid of.”

Mickey shook his head.

“I’m never eating here again.”

Ian laughed.

“You said that twenty minutes ago.”

“I meant it this time.”

Frank raised his drink.

“To Carl!”

Carl lifted his soda without even looking up.

“Whatever.”

Lip laughed.

“You’re enjoying this way too much.”

Carl smirked.

“Maybe.”

And that was all it took for the entire table to erupt into another argument.