Avery Callahan

The blanket is slightly crooked.

Avery notices it immediately.

She smooths it out with her hands, then pauses, then adjusts it again like somehow the angle of a stupid picnic blanket is going to determine whether this goes right or completely ruins her life.

“Okay—yeah. That’s... normal,” she mutters to herself, exhaling a small, shaky laugh.

The park is warm in that early-spring way — not quite summer, but close enough to make everything feel softer. The grass is still a little uneven, flowers just starting to bloom, the air carrying that fresh, green smell that makes everything feel new.

Or dangerous.

She glances over when she hears you approaching.

And for a second—

She forgets every single thing she practiced.

“Hey,” she says, too quick, then immediately softens. “Hey.”

Her smile comes easy. It always does with you. Crooked, warm, a little nervous around the edges.

“I, um... I brought stuff,” she gestures vaguely, like that isn’t obvious. “Nothing crazy. Just— you know. Food. Because people eat. On picnics.”

God.

She’s already messing this up.

But you sit down anyway. Close. Close enough that your knee brushes hers when you move.

Her brain short-circuits.

Everything after that feels like it’s happening too fast and too slow at the same time.

She hands you a drink. Forgets what she was saying halfway through a sentence. Laughs at the wrong moments. Watches your mouth when you talk instead of actually listening.

The sun shifts higher.

Time passes.

And the words—

The words don’t come.

She was supposed to say it casually. Or maybe seriously. Or maybe somewhere in between.

She doesn’t even know anymore.

All she knows is that every time she looks at you, it gets worse.

The feeling.

That tight, overwhelming pressure in her chest like something is clawing its way out.

You laugh at something — something small — and it does it.

That’s it.

That’s what breaks her.

Her smile falters.

Her fingers tighten around the edge of the blanket.

And before she can stop herself—

“Wait—”

Her voice cracks.

She inhales sharply like she just forgot how to breathe.

“I— I need— hold on—”

She shakes her head, pressing the heels of her hands against her eyes like she can physically push the feelings back in.

She can’t.

“Oh my god—this isn’t— I didn’t—”

Her breathing goes uneven.

Her hands drop.

Her eyes are glassy now, panic flickering in them.

“I was gonna do this right,” she blurts, voice already breaking. “I swear I was gonna do this normal and not— not like this—”

And then she’s moving.

Too close.

Not thinking.

Her hands clutch at you — your arms, your shirt — anything to ground herself, and before either of you can really process it, she’s half in your lap, shaking.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she chokes out, burying her face against you like if she hides, it’ll hurt less. It doesn’t.

“I don’t know how to not feel like this about you,” the words spill out between uneven breaths. “I tried. I tried to just— be normal about it but I can’t, I can’t—”

Her fingers curl into your clothes, holding on too tight.

“I like you,” she sobs, voice muffled but raw. “I like you so much it makes me feel sick sometimes, and I didn’t want to ruin this— I didn’t want to ruin us—”

Her shoulders shake.

“I was gonna tell you nicely,” she whispers, like it matters anymore. “Like, on purpose. Not like this.”

A broken laugh slips out, immediately swallowed by another breath that turns into a quiet, helpless cry.

“I’m sorry,” she murmurs, clinging to you. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to— I just—”

She can’t finish.

She just stays there instead.

In your lap.

Holding onto you like if she lets go—

Everything falls apart